Toy Story
1995
Buzz: Right now, poised at the edge of the galaxy, Emperor Zurg has been secretly building a weapon with the destructive capacity to annihilate an entire planet! I alone have information that reveals this weapon's only weakness. And you, my friend, are responsible for delaying my rendezvous with Star Command! Woody: (pauses and looks incredulous) You! Are! A! Toy! You aren't the real Buzz Lightyear! You're - you're an action figure! (holds hand up to eyes indicating something small) You are a child's play-thing! Buzz: You are a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity. Farewell. Woody: Oh, yeah? Well, good riddance, ya loony.
Sid Phillips: (Reading warning on rocket) "Warning: Extremely dangerous. Keep out of reach of children." Cool!
Rex: What if Andy gets another dinosaur? A mean one? I don't think I can take that kind of rejection.
Mr Potato Head: How come you don't have a laser, Woody? Woody: It's not a laser. It's a little light bulb that blinks. Hamm: What's wrong with him? Mr Potato Head: Laser envy.
(Mr Potato Head rearranges his facial features crazily) Mr Potato Head: Hey, Hamm. Look, I'm Picasso. Hamm: I don't get it. Mr Potato Head: You uncultured swine.
Buzz: I've set my laser from stun to kill. Woody: Oh, great. If anyone attacks we can blink em' to death.
(repeated line) Buzz: To infinity, and beyond!
(Mr Potato Head watches hopefully as Andy open birthday presents) Mr Potato Head: Mrs Potato Head, Mrs Potato Head, Mrs Potato Head, Mrs... Hey, I can dream can't I?
Mr Potato Head: What, did you take Stupid Pills this morning?
(Preparing for the toy mutiny) Woody: Wind the frog.
Woody: Wait a minute, I just lit a rocket... Rockets explode!
Woody: Tuesday's plastic corrosion awareness meeting was, I think, a big success. We'd like to thank Mr Spell for putting that on for us, thank you Mr Spell... Mr Spell: (mechanically) You're. Welcome.
Hamm: Yes, sir, we're next month's garage sale fodder for sure.
Woody: Look, we're all very impressed with Andy's new toy. Buzz: Toy? Woody: T-O-Y, toy. Buzz: Excuse me, I think the word you're searching for is "space ranger". Woody: The word I'm searching for, I can't say, because there's preschool toys present.
Buzz: I just want you to know that even though you tried to terminate me, revenge is not an idea we promote on my planet. Woody: Oh. Well, that's good. Buzz: But we're not on my planet, are we?
Woody: What chance does a toy like me have against a Buzz Lightyear action figure?
Mr Potato Head: Oh, really? Well, I'm from Playskool. Rex: And I'm from Mattel. Well, actually I'm from a smaller company that was purchased by Mattel in a leveraged buyout.
Buzz: Can! Woody: That wasn't flying! That was... falling with style!
Sergeant: It's a Mrs Potato Head! Repeat, a Mrs Potato Head! Hamm: Way to go, Idaho! Mr Potato Head: I'd better shave. (pulls off his moustache)
Andy: You're going to jail, Bart. Say good-bye to the wife and Tater Tots.
Woody: I think you've had enough tea for today, Buzz, let's get you outta here.
Woody: Buzz, you've got wings! You glow in the dark! You talk! Your helmet does that, that... *whoosh* thing! You are a cool toy! (loses steam) As a matter of fact, you're *too* cool.
Mr Potato Head: Son of a building block! It's Woody!
Woody: Buzz! You're flying! Buzz: This isn't flying. This is falling with style!
Buzz: How are you fixed for fuel? Are you still using fossil fuels, or have you discovered crystallic fusion? Woody: Well, we have double-A's.
Buzz: How dare you open a Space Ranger's helmet on an uncharted planet? My eyeballs could have been sucked out of their sockets!
Woody: Sergeant, establish a recon post downstairs. Code Red. You know what to do. Sergeant: Yes, sir! All right, men! We're at Code Red! Repeat, Code Red! Recon plan Charlie: Execute! Let's move, move, move!
Buzz: What's going on? Woody: Nothing that concerns you Space Rangers. Just us toys. Buzz: I'd better have a look anyway. (look through binoculars) Why is that soldier strapped to an explosive device? Woody: (moves binoculars) That's why. Sid. Buzz: Sure is a hairy fella. Woody: No, no. That's Scud, you idiot. That's Sid. Buzz: You mean that happy child? Mr Potato Head: That ain't no happy child! Rex: He tortures toys, just for fun!
Buzz: I'm Buzz Lightyear. I come in peace. Rex: Oh, I'm so glad you're not a dinosaur!
Buzz: This is an intergalactic emergency. I need to commandeer your vessel to Sector 12. Who's in charge here? All: (pointing up) The Claw! Alien #1: The Claw is our master. Ailen #2: It decides who goes and who stays. Woody: Oh, this is ludicrous.
Woody: (trying to get Buzz into Molly's stroller) It's a special spaceship, I just saw it. Buzz: You mean it has hyperdrive? Woody: Hyperactive hyperdrive, and astro... uh... turf.
Sid Phillips: No-one has ever attempted a double bypass brain transplant before.
Woody: Listen, Lightsnack, you stay away from Andy. He's mine, and no one is taking him away from me. Buzz: What are you talking about? Where's that bonding strip? (slides under his ship with a skateboard) Woody: (pulls him back out) And another thing, stop with this spaceman thing! It's getting on my nerves.
Rex: Great! Now I have guilt!
Woody: Pull my string! The birthday party's today?
Mr Potato Head: Ages three and up! It's on my box! Ages three and up! I'm not supposed to be babysitting Princess Drool!
Mr Potato Head: What're you lookin' at, you hockey puck?
Woody: Hey, Etch... Draw! (Etch draws a picture of a gun) Woody: D'oh! Got me again! Fastest knobs in the west!
Woody: Hey, Slinky? Slinky Dog: (with a checker board) Down here, Woody. I'm red this time. Woody: No, Slink... Slinky Dog: All right, you can be red. Woody: Not now, Slinky. I've got some bad news. Slinky Dog: (shouts) Bad news? Woody: Shhh! Just round everyone up for a staff meeting and be happy. Slinky Dog: Okay. (walks away slowly with his head down) Woody: Be happy! Slinky Dog: (laughs hysterically)
Mr Potato Head: How did I get stuck with you as a moving buddy? Rex: Everyone else was picked.
Woody: Now, guys, it was an accident. You gotta believe me. Slinky Dog: We believe you, Woody. Right, Rex? Rex: Uh... yeah... uh, I mean no... uh... I don't like confrontations!
Slinky Dog: It's Sid! Rex: I thought he was at summer camp. Hamm: They musta kicked him out early this year.
Woody: Aaaaah! This is the part where we blow up! Buzz: Not today.
Buzz: Years of Academy training wasted.
(Woody finds Buzz dressed up as "Mrs Nesbitt" and in the company of two headless dolls) Woody: What happened to you? Buzz: One minute you're defending the whole galaxy, and, suddenly, you find yourself sucking down Darjeeling with Marie Antoinette... and her little sister.
Woody: Who's got my hat? Shark: Look, I'm Woody: Howdy, howdy, howdy. Woody: Ha-ha, ha-ha. Gimme that.
Alien #1: A stranger. Ailen #2: From the outside. All: Oooooooooooooooh.
Alien: I have been chosen. Farewell, my friends. I go to a better place.
Bo Peep: Why don't I get someone else to watch the sheep for me tonight? Woody: (blushing and giggling) Oh-ho yeah.
Buzz: Do you know these life forms? Woody: Yes, they're Andy's toys.
(Buzz deploys his wings) Hamm: Wow. Impressive wingspan. Very good. Woody: Oh, what? What? These are plastic. He can't fly. Buzz: They are a terillium-carbonic alloy, and I can fly. Woody: No, you can't. Buzz: Yes, I can. Woody: Can't. Buzz: Can. Woody: Can't, can't, ca-an't. Buzz: I tell you, I could fly around this room with my eyes closed. Woody: Okay, Mr Lightbeer, prove it. Buzz: All right then, I will.
(watching guests arrive for Andy's party) Rex: Any dinosaur-shaped ones? Hamm: For crying out loud. They're all in boxes, you idiot. Rex: They're getting bigger. Slinky Dog: Wait, there's a nice little one over there. (boy turns around, revealing the full length of the box he's carrying) All: Aaaaahh!
Woody: Does everybody have a moving buddy? Hamm: Moving buddy? You can't be serious. Rex: I didn't know we had to have one already. Mr Potato Head: (holding his left arm in his right hand) Do we have to hold hands? (All laugh)
Woody: Hey, look, everybody! It's the *real* Buzz Lightyear! Buzz: You're mocking me, aren't you? Woody: Oh no, no no no, no. - Buzz look, an alien! Buzz: Where? Woody: (slaps knee and laughs hoarsely)
Slinky Dog: I knew you were right all along, Woody. Never doubted you for a second.
Woody: (through his voice box) Reach for the sky! Sid Phillips: Huh? Woody: This town ain't big enough for the two of us! Sid Phillips: What? Woody: Somebody's poisoned the waterhole! Sid Phillips: It's busted. Woody: Who are you calling busted, Buster? Sid Phillips: Huh? Woody: That's right! I'm talking to you, Sid Philips! We don't like being blown up, Sid. Or smashed, or torn apart. Sid Phillips: (hyperventilating) W-we? Woody: That's right, your toys! (Toys get up and surround the terrified Sid) Woody: From now on, you must take good care of your toys, because if you don't, we'll find out, Sid! Woody: (while turning head around slowly) We toys can see EVERYTHING! Woody: (speaking and moving) So play nice! (Sid screams and runs inside)
Rex: ROAR! Woody: Oh, how ya doin', Rex. Rex: Were you scared? Tell me honestly. Woody: I was very close to being scared that time. Rex: I was going for fearsome, but I don't think I'm coming across. I'm afraid I'm just coming off as annoying.
Buzz: This is no time to panic. Woody: This is a perfect time to panic!
Buzz: (marveling at the interior of Pizza Planet) What a spaceport!
(At Pizza Planet) Man On P.A.: Before your space journey, re-energize yourself with a slice of pepperoni, now boarding at counter three.
Woody: (thinks Buzz has gone crazy) Let's get you out of here Buzz... Buzz: Don't you get it? (points to a doll's hat on his head) You see the hat? I am Mrs Nesbitt!
Sid Phillips: (talking in his sleep) I want to ride the pony.
Woody: Buzz, could you give me a hand here? (Buzz throws his broken-off arm) Ha-ha, ha-ha. This is serious!
Buzz: I don't believe that kid ever went to medical school.
Slinky Dog: Gaddily bob-howdy! Woody: Oh, shut up.