The Object of My Affection

1998

Constance: I enjoy gay people, but I just have a slight problem with my pregnant sister being in love with one of them.

Nina: Don't open the door for any gas men. Unless you think either one of us would be interested.

Nina: I like guys a lot, but I'm not going to waste my time with some guy that doesn't see things the way I do... I mean do you really need this guy?

Nina: I want you to be with me, I want you to marry me, I want you to love me the way that I love you.

Nina: You don't tell a woman that you love her and then two days later bring Romeo over to sleep with him.

Nina: You have to pick one person and make it work.

Rodney: Don't fix your life so that you're left alone right as you come to the middle of it.

Sidney: If I wasn't happily married and you weren't my wife's stepsister I'd have an affair with you in a second.

Nina: Freud didn't know DICK about women.

Rodney Fraser: One shouldn't be too hard on oneself when the object of one's affection returns the favor with rather less enthusiasm than one might have hoped.

Dr Robert Joley: We're too old to settle for a twin-bedded friendship.

Rodney Fraser: Have you noticed that you're the only practicing heterosexual at your Thanksgiving dinner? Nina Borowski: I haven't practiced for a while.

George Hanson: I'm simple, that's why I teach first grade.

Sidney: I swear, I'm hotter than a goat in China.

Sidney: Betty, we should go. Constance: Betty was your other wife. I'm Constance.

Constance: Do you love him? Nina: Yeah, whatever that means.

Nina: I want to look at you and not feel so hurt by you.

George Hanson: Do you ever just want to touch her nose? I mean its like a Tulip. Nina: Don't start that with her.

Nina: Head up young person.

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