The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
2003
Tom Sawyer: Boy. They told me European women had funny ways.
Dr Henry Jekyll: No. Hyde will never use me again. Dorian Gray: Then what good are you?
Marksman #2: What are you? Dorian Gray: I'm complicated.
(Chasing Moriarty, Tom Sawyer bumps into an invisible man) Tom Sawyer: Skinner? (to Quatermaine) It's okay! It's Skinner! (to the invisible man) What the hell are you doing here? Sanderson Reed: What makes you think I'm Skinner, huh?
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : Oh, chemist, eh? Do we get to blow something up, then?
Mina Harker: Not Gray. He's lived long enough.
Allan Quatermain: Ah, you're missing a picture, Mr Gray. Dorian Gray: And you don't miss a thing, do you, Mr Quartermain? Allan Quatermain: Oh, sometimes.
Mina Harker: A man who worships death. Can we trust him? Allan Quatermain: He's not the one I'm worried about.
Allan Quartermain: Well, we were the faster, but now we're the tortoise to his hair. Dr Henry Jekyll: So, we're done? Tom Sawyer: No, we're alive, if M has any idea to the contrary, that gives us an edge. Captain Nemo: The sea is vast, he could be anywhere. Tom Sawyer: Yeah, well, I'm an optimist, now maybe that's a crime to you twisted so-and-so's but it keeps me from going crazy. Mina Harker: Your optimisms out of place Tom Sawyer: You're wrong! Because we'll get out, man. at least, *I* will. That other agent I told you about. was my childhood friend. We were agents together until the phantom shot him dead. Now you can be done, but I am not. I will avenge his death. Dr Henry Jekyll: It's not about any one of us Tom, it's bigger than that. Tom Sawyer: Yes, it is, Jekyll! That fate for the world is in our hands. the world. So M tricked you, he brought you all together and you walked straight into his trap. But the way that I see it, that's the part he did wrong. He brought you together. Dr Henry Jekyll: He has a point. Allan Quartermain: And the boy becomes a man... perhaps a leader of men. Mina Harker: And Women.
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : That's the last time I ever play with matches.
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : And they'll provide an antidote... well, that's if I'm a good boy. Allan Quatermain: And are you a good boy? Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : I guess you'll find out, won't you?
Dorian Gray: Mina. You're alive. Mina Harker: It's possible I can't die. Same could be said of you. Let's put it to the test.
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : OW. You scratched me. Dorian Gray: Better me than him.
Dorian Gray: Ah. The bedroom, Mina. Does it give you memories? Or ideas? Mina Harker: Ideas. (Mina kicks him upwards)
Dorian Gray: If that had been permanent, I'd have been very upset.
Dorian Gray: Empires crumble. There are no exceptions. M: You think you're better than me. You forget. I've seen your painting.
Mina Harker: You broke my heart once. This time you missed.
Allan Quatermain: If you can't do it with one bullet, don't do it at all.
Sanderson Reed: Where is your sense of patriotism? Allan Quatermain: (stands up with a drink) God save the Queen. (the other patrons of the club mutter an apathetic return to the toast) Nigel God save her.: Allan Quartermain: (to Reed) That's about as patriotic as it gets around here.
Allan Quatermain: Automatic rifles. Who in God's name has automatic rifles? Club Patron: Dashed unsporting. Probably Belgian.
Sanderson Reed: They're indestructible. Allan Quatermain: No, just armor-plated.
Mina Harker: You're sweet... and you're young. Neither are traits that I hold in high regard.
Mina Harker: Do you realize what you've done? What you've let out of me? Dorian Gray: A woman's wrath? Oh, I'm petrified.
M: How many times do I have to kill these cretins?
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : Allow me to introduce myself. Rodney Skinner, gentleman thief. Now, I thought invisibility would be a boon to my work. Well, you can imagine, it was my undoing. Once you're invisible, it's bloody hard to turn back.
Dorian Gray: I'm an immortal, sir, not a gazelle. How can we outrun this? (Tom Sawyer brings out Nemo's car) Tom Sawyer: Care for a spin?
(Discussing Sawyer's shooting style) Allan Quatermain: Oh, I saw... Very American. Fire enough bullets and hope to hit the target.
Dorian Gray: I hoped I'd get to nail you one more time. Didn't think it'd be literally.
Dorian Gray: Bomb-voyage.
(Mina jumps and gasps like something just grabbed her behind) Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : I've been waiting all week to do that. Allan Quatermain: Get a grip, man. Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : Well, I thought I just did. (Mina slaps him) Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : Oooh, Mina... Captain Nemo: Report. Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : Well, hello to you, too. And need I remind you, I am naked in the snow. I can't feel any of my extremities. And I mean... any of them.
Sanderson Reed: There is great unrest. Countries set at each other's throats, baying for blood. It's a powder-keg. The trouble of which I speak could set a match to the whole thing: War. Allan Quatermain: Wi-With whom, exactly? Sanderson Reed: Everyone. A world war. Allan Quatermain: That notion makes you sweat? Sanderson Reed: Heavens, man. Doesn't it you? Allan Quatermain: This is Africa, dear boy. Sweating is what we do.
(Clanging metal sounds from inside Nautilus) Tom Sawyer: What is it? Captain Nemo: The sound of treachery.
Captain Nemo: Contain your evil, Doctor. I'll not have the brute free upon my ship. Must I take drastic steps? Dr Henry Jekyll: I am in control. Captain Nemo: I very much doubt it. Dr Henry Jekyll: Your talk is all well and good, sir... but your own past is far from laudable.
Allan Quatermain: I may have been overly rude earlier... when I called you a pirate. Captain Nemo: And I may have been overly charitable... when I said I wasn't. But I try to live in the now... where the ghosts of old wrongs do not abide.
(after throwing the invisible man out of his room) Allan Quatermain: Skinner, I want you dressed at all times, eh? Or it's my boot up your arse.
M: You can't kill the future.
Dr Henry Jekyll: Let's not make a saint out of a sinner. Next time he may not be so helpful.
Nigel: Perhaps I should toddle off, should I, Allan? Allan Quatermain: Yes, of course, Nigel. You toddle off. Nigel: Toddling.
(Dorian and Mina, both immortals, are fighting) Dorian Gray: We'll be at this all day.
Sanderson Reed: But you're Allan Quartermain. Stories of your exploits have thrilled English boys for decades. Allan Quatermain: That I know. And Nigel has done a grand job reminding me. But... with... each... past exploit... I've lost friends, white men and black... and much more. And I'm not the man I once was.
(to Tom Sawyer) Allan Quatermain: May this new century be yours, son, as the old one was mine.
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : So, how did M get you? Allan Quatermain: None of your business. Mina Harker: You're a little testy, Mr Q. Allan Quatermain: Mrs Harker, I doubt if you measure danger the way I do. Mina Harker: And I imagine you with quite the library, Mr Quatermain. All those books you must have read merely by looking at their covers. Allan Quatermain: I've had women along on past exploits, and found them to be, at best, a distraction. Mina Harker: Do I distract you? Allan Quatermain: My dear girl, I've buried two wives and many lovers... and I'm in no mood for more of either. Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : You can send 'em my way. Allan Quatermain: Skinner, shut up.
M: James Moriarty? The so-called Napoleon of crime? That man died at Reichenbach Falls. He died, and I was reborn.
Mr Hyde: Trouble? I call it sport.
Rodney Skinner (The Invisible Man) : This is a charming spot. Does Jack the Ripper live here?
M: I hope I've got your fire when I'm your age. Allan Quatermain: You will not live beyond today. That I promise you.
(Describing an opponent who overdosed on the Hyde formula) Mr Hyde: It's me on a bad day.
Mr Hyde: Don't be afraid. Tom Sawyer: Who says I'm afraid? Mr Hyde: YOU DO. Mina Harker: (Dodging flying chains) Ohh. Mr Hyde: YOU STINK OF FEAR.
Sanderson Reed: The Empire needs you. Allan Quatermain: But the question is, do I need the Empire?
M: They've discovered these attacks are all the work of one man who calls himself the Fantom. Allan Quatermain: Very operatic. And what's in it for him? M: Profit.
Captain Nemo: This is my first mate. Ishmael: Call me Ishmael.
Marksman #1: Draw your pistol. Captain Nemo: I walk a different path. (Draws his sword and attacks, successfully)
M: To that end, I set my wolf among you sheep. Dorian Gray: Growl.
Captain Nemo: You underestimate the Nautilus. You underestimate her greatly.
Allan Quatermain: (sniffs air) He's afraid Tom Sawyer: (sniffs air) I don't smell anything
Rodney Skinner: And I thought I was special. You're invulnerable to harm. Dorian Gray: I don't like to boast.
Edward Hyde: Yes, Henry. Look, but don't touch. That's your way. Dr Henry Jekyll: Just shut up. I won't be tricked again. Edward Hyde: Tricked? You've known what I was about each time you drank the formula. Dr Henry Jekyll: Liar. I am a good man. Edward Hyde: Who's lying now? You want it, even more than you want her. Dr Henry Jekyll: No. Edward Hyde: You can't shut me out forever. Drink the elixir. Dr Henry Jekyll: No. Edward Hyde: She barely even looks at you... Dr Henry Jekyll: Be quiet. Edward Hyde: SHE LOOKED AT ME.
Allan Quartermain: I don't like theatrics. M: After Africa's veldts, London's climate isn't affecting your mood, I see... Allan Quartermain: Identify yourself. M: I am known by many names, Mr Quartermain. My underlings call me Sir. My superiors call me M. Allan Quartermain: M? M: Just M.
Professor Moriarty: To the death. But you'll need Hyde to make it mine. Allan Quartermain: He'll be making his own fight.
Rodney Skinner (the Invisible Man) : Oh, brandy anyone? Dorian Gray: Help yourself. Mina Harker: Don't let it ruin your makeup. Captain Nemo: I'm impressed, Mr Gray. You take Skinner's uniqueness in your stride. Dorian Gray: Well, I've seen too much in my life to shock easily.
Dorian Gray: I've lived long enough to see the future become history, Professor.
(Quartermain pulls Sawyer out from under some falling rubble) Allan Quartermain: Heh. That was naughty. Tom Sawyer: Thanks. Allan Quartermain: Eyes open, boy. I can't protect you all the time.
(Sawyer pushes Quartermain out of the way of a thrown knife) Tom Sawyer: Look out! (they both fall over) Tom Sawyer: (smiling) Eyes open, boy. I can't protect you all the time!
Mina Harker: (Imitating Quatermaine) This hunt is to dangerous for a woman, even one such as you, leave it to me.
(Deflecting an enemy's bullets) Mr Edward Hyde: IS THAT ALL YOU'VE GOT?
Rodney Skinner (the Invisible Man) : Hello, Dorian. The great white hunter's bagged his prize. (they hear and see men being thrashed) Dorian Gray: Or the prize bagged him. (Quartermain is corraling Mr Hyde) Allan Quartermain: Stay back, if you value your lives.
Mr Hyde: (his first lines) Home. Home is where the heart is; that's what they say. And I havn't seen london in so long, It's sorrow is as sweet to me as a rare wine. Mr Hyde: (eyeing Mina Harker while speaking to Quatermain) I am yours.
Captain Nemo: Behold Nautilus; the Sword of the Ocean. Next stop Paris.