The Black Cauldron
1985
Gurgi: Oh, poor miserable Gurgi deserves fierce smackings and whackings on his poor, tender head. Always left with no munchings and crunching.
Eilonwy: I'm Princess Eilonwy. Are you a lord, or a warrior? Taran: Uh, no. Uh... I-I-I'm an assistant pig keeper. Eilonwy: Oh, what a pity. I was so hoping for someone who could help me escape. Oh, well, if you want to come with me, you may.
Eilonwy: Oh, Taran, I'm afraid it'll soon be over for us. Taran: I hadn't planned it to end like this, Eilonwy. Fflewddur Fflam: Oh, I wish I'd stayed a toad.
Gurgi: If great lord go into evil castle, poor Gurgi will never see his friend again. Nope. Never.
Fflewddur Fflam: I'm Fflewddur Fflam, minstrel of minstrels! Balladeer to the grandest courts in all the land! (harp string snaps) Fflewddur Fflam: And I, uh, eh? Eh, well, have you forgotten? I have sung in some of the finest courts... (another string snaps) Fflewddur Fflam: Well, I'm only waiting for an invitation. (another one snaps) Fflewddur Fflam: Oh, shush. Why do you have to judge every word I say?
Orddu: Now listen carefully. The Black Cauldron can never be destroyed. Only its evil power can be stopped. Taran: Then there is a way. But how? Orddu: A living thing must climb into it of its own free will. Gurgi: Gurgi is bold and brave. He will climb into evil cauldron. Orddu: However, the poor duckling will never climb out alive. Gurgi: (jumping away from the cauldron) Yikes!
Dallben: Hen Wen, from you, I do beseech / Knowledge that lies beyond my reach / Troubled thoughts beyond your heart / Pray you now, those thoughts impart.
The Horned King: Soon the Black Cauldron will be mine. Its evil power will course through my veins, and I shall make you Cauldron Born. Yes. Yes. Oh, yes. Then you will worship me! Me. Oh, my soldiers. How long I have thirsted to be a god among mortal men.
Taran: Have you seen my pig? Gurgi: Piggy? Big round piggy? Long snout (snorts) Taran: Yes, yes. Gurgi: Curly tail? Taran: That's her! That's Hen-Wen! Gurgi: Uh-uh, Gurgi not seen piggy. Nope.
Orddu: It's decided, then. You shall have the Black Cauldron. Eilonwy: You mean, you'll give it to us? Orddu: That's not what I said. You weren't listening. We never give anything away. What we do is bargain, trade. Taran: Well, you'll not have my sword!
Eilonwy: Weren't you a bit frightened, Fflewdurr? Fflewddur Fflam: A Fflam frightened? That word is not in my vocabulary. (harp strings vibrate; Fflewddur stops them) Fflewddur Fflam: But in this case, well chosen, my dear.
Creeper: Oh, I'm sorry. I've ignored you. You did come for the Black Cauldron, didn't you? Good. Then climb in! It will only cost you your life.
Taran: What does a girl know about swords, anyway? Eilonwy: "Girl"? "Girl"? If it wasn't for this *girl*, you would still be in the Horned King's dungeon.
(Gurgi is hugging Fflewddur Fflam, who thinks he is being attacked) Fflewddur Fflam: Help! Get this thing off me! Gurgi: Oh, Gurgi's happy day! (Gurgi puts on Fflewddur's hat) Wow! Fflewddur Fflam: Yes, keep it! It's a gift! Gurgi: (Holding Fflewddur's harp) This! Gurgi want this! Fflewddur Fflam: Take it! I'm sure you've murdered for less.
Gurgi: No, master. Not go into evil cauldron. Taran: If I don't, we're all lost. Out of my way. Gurgi: Gurgi not let his friend die. Taran has many friends. Gurgi has no friends. Taran: No, Gurgi! Don't jump! No! (Gurgi jumps into Cauldron) Taran: No!
Orddu: We have business with your little hero. Taran: Hero? Gurgi was the hero. Orddu: The only thing that mattered to you was the Cauldron, but now it is of no use to you. So we shall take it and be on our way. Fflewddur Fflam: Stay your hand, ladies. We never give anything away. We bargain, we trade. Remember? Orddu: Did these old ears hear the word "bargain"? Fflewddur Fflam: Yes, Madam, your old ears heard right. Orwen: Oh, I just adore forceful men. Fflewddur Fflam: Oh, pull yourself together, Madam.
The Horned King: I presume, my boy, you are the keeper of this oracular pig.
Taran: (to a goat) His royal majesty, the Horned King. We meet at last. (Taran rattles the goat's horns with his stick) Taran: Even the Horned King trembles with fear. See, Hen-Wen? Everyone runs from the famous Taran of Cael Dallben. (the goat butts Taran and knocks him down) Taran: (pretending to die) Prydain's greatest warrior breathes his last.
(as the army of the dead collapses) The Horned King: This had better not be your fault! (grabs Creeper by the neck) Creeper: Perhaps it just needs another body, Sire. The Horned King: Yes. *Yours*!
Taran: I'm not afraid of the Horned King. Dallben: Then you are a very foolish boy.
Taran: For your sake, you'd better be telling the truth. Gurgi: Gurgi not lie. Not this time.
Gurgi: (offering Orddu an apple core) Gurgi will trade his munchings and crunchings. Orddu: Who would want... ? Orgoch: Hold it, sister! Not so fast! (takes core and eats it)
(as he activates the Black Cauldron) The Horned King: Now I call on my Army of the Dead; the Cauldron-born! Arise, my messengers of death! Our time has arrived!
(approaching Taran with fury) The Horned King: You've interfered for the last time! Creeper: Ha ha! Go for his throat, sire! The Horned King: (shouting) NOW, PIG KEEPER, YOU SHALL DIE!