Satan's Little Helper
2004
Merrill Whooly: (on cell-phone handset) Betty! No, I'm in the car. I'm going to pick up Jenna at the ferry. She came home to spend Halloween with her brother. Is that true love or what? Douglas Whooly: Jenna's my girlfriend. I'm going to marry her. Merrill Whooly: He says he's going to marry her. I don't think they got up to the word "incest" in the third grade, yet. Douglas Whooly: You said "sex"! Merrill Whooly: (to Dougie) I said "incest," and don't be so stupid - play your game!
Merrill Whooly: (on cell-phone handset) That's why I was calling you: I *do* have a costume! I'm putting together this Carmen-Miranda-and-Chiquita-Banana-type thing. It came to me in a dream. Actually, I *was* stoned. (covers her mouth after realizing that her young son is in the car with her)
Douglas Whooly: Just let him go back to Hell! Jenna: He killed Daddy; his ass is *fuckin'* grass!
Mrs Tishbaum: Where did you get that coat? Looks like you robbed it from a Hasid!
Jenna: When you were trick-or-treating, did Satan kill Alex's father? Douglas Whooly: When we were trick-or-treating, he threw a guy out a window. Jenna: Was it a big brick house? (Dougie nods) That man was Alex's father. (pause) (Jenna's jaw drops) *And* *Jesus* *is* *Satan!*