Party Monster
2003
Michael Alig: You'll love me, I promise.
James: You've gone too far with the drugs Michael Alig: Have you looked in the mirror lately?
Christina: How do you like my UFO?
Michael Alig: We don't do, we just are!
(to the Club Kids) Dallas stage hand: Okay, you guys are on stage in five. James: What do you mean, on stage? Dallas stage hand: You know - your show. James: Wait, what show? (stage hand walks off) But we don't do anything!
James: I'm not addicted to drugs, I'm addicted to glamour.
Michael: 132nd street, and on the double! Keoki: Are we going very far? Michael: All the way, I hope...
Michael Alig: (singing) Greetings, citizens. We are living in the age where the pursuit of all values other than money, success, fame and glamour, has either been discredited or destroyed. Money, success, fame, glamour.
Michael: We're like two peas in a pod, you and I, James. James: I pity the pod.
(after James' phone conversion with Michael, who is in prison) Interviewer: I can't believe you still talk to him. James: Well, when was the last time you heard of a pea changing its pod?
James: No No No for the love of god no,We are not going to start out with Michael Alig's pathetic childhood "I was molested Wahh!"
Michael: But it's my birthday and I wanna have a bloodfeast!
Michael Alig: Oh, everyone, it's my birthday! Time to pay attention to me!
Talk Show Host: Is it true your son Michael turned you on to the pill ecstacy? Elke: He told me it was a headache pill. Talk Show Host: And what happened when you took it? Elke: Well, my headache went away.
Talk Show Host: ... and what happened when you took the pill? Elke: (pauses) well, my headache went away.
Michael: Hi, I'm Michael Alig. James: Well, I'll alert the media. Gotta dash!
Michael: Oh, no thanks... I don't do drugs. James: Nor do I. (snorts Special K) Did you see that? It just flew right up my nose!
(phone conversation) Michael Alig: It's not so bad and after Gitsie and I get married we can have conjugal visits! James: Oh Michael, Im so sorry, didn't you hear? Gitsie's dead. She had an overdose. (Michael is silent)
(arguing with Angel) Michael Alig: You're just some lame-ass, Johnny-come-lately, fairy, faggot, copycat! You don't even know your skrink from your skrod! You stupid logger blogger!
James: Oh darling, half the fun of eating meat is hacking it up!
Michael Alig: James, would I lie to you James: All the time!
Michael Alig: Let's see... what else, oh once when I was 10 my Sunday school teacher took me back to his house. He taught me how to french kiss among other things... Elke: He really took my boy under his wind. Very nice man. Michael Alig: His mother caught us in the basement. She screamed, "I told you not to bring them here." He said, "Don't you'll frighten them away!"
Michael Alig: (to James St James) I want you to teach me how to be fabulous.
Keoki: (hesitant) Wow, I never thought I'd be taking a cab to the Bronx with a guy. I figured I come to the club... tell a few girls "no, not tonite"... It's just... ehh, you know... Michael Alig: Get in. Keoki: Okay.
Michael Alig: (to Peter Gatien) I love the eyepatch by the way. Very... Pirates of the Caribbean... *arg* Natasha: He lost it. Michael Alig: Whatever
James: Well, congratulations on getting out of the very dangerous world of haberdashery! Freez: Well, drugs are just a sideline. (sniffs) Profitable, though. James: Hmm. (holds up top of clenched hand) May I sample your wares?
James: That's better than a ten-inch dick and you know it!
James: Today I've come up with the perfect sentence. The rhythm, the syntax, the dipthongs, the dissidence (clears throat) Last night, I dreamt of Glocca Morra... again. (pause) It's really a shame you can't publish a sentence. I'm convinced it would be a best-seller.
James: Tesing one, two. Testing. Testosterone, testicular cancer, Tess of the D'urbervilles.
Male Geisha: Why doesn't Fran come into work anymore? James: Because she's been indicted for tax evasion and cannot leave her house. Male Geisha: Oh... I miss Fran. Her new house is neat and tidy.