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Oliver's Travels

1995 (mini)

Oliver: In the great galaxy of education: it was the best of terms, it was the worst of terms. My travels began once upon a time in the Rhondda Valley. I got up, washed, showered and shaved, ate my bran, checked the crossword, and went to work. As it turned out, I might have been better advised to stay at home. It depends on how you feel about murder, corruption, and organized crime. I have always been against them. On the other hand, I have always been in favor of love. A tricky little conundrum, and very like life.

Oliver: You taught yourself computer technology? T. H. Moody: (nods) Social and Economic History, that was my field. But when I saw what was happening in the real world... Oliver: Ah, yes, the real world. T. H. Moody: Survival of the fittest. Adapt or die. I noticed that history was, uh... Oliver: ... a thing of the past.

(Mrs Moody offers her condolences on Oliver's being let go from the university) Oliver: I expected it from the first moment. Mrs Moody: You did? Oliver: A letter arrived from your husband inviting me to meet him at a sherry party. It was signed, 'T. H. MOODY." Mrs Moody: Theodore Horatio. Family names, God help us. Oliver: But don't you see? It's an anagram of 'THY DOOM.' "Oliver," I said to myself, "prepare to meet thy doom," and I did.

Oliver: I'm feeling the chill of middle age. I need the warmth of a good woman. Mrs Moody: Bullshit. (walks away) Oliver: Also, I know something very funny about sex, and you'll never know what it is.

Oliver: I'll walk with you. Diane Priest: I don't need masculine protection. Oliver: Certainly not mine. I have the body of a weak and feeble man.

Diane Priest: Just go away... forever. Oliver: If I do, you'll never find out. Diane Priest: What? Oliver: The very funny thing I know about sex.

T. H. Moody: Oh, you teach, uh, Comparative Religion? Oliver: My chosen specialist subject. I originally planned to go off to London to play a cool jazz tenor saxophone, but somehow I drifted.

Oliver: I tried to call you 'Mrs Priest,' and you said to me, "Diane, not Priest." Diane Priest: "Diane, not Priest." Oliver: Those words are a perfect anagram of 'predestination.' Diane Priest: What's predestination got to do with it? Oliver: As I understand it in simple terms, and without wishing to embarrass you, it means... we were sent on this Earth to be together. Diane Priest: Holy Mother of God.

Oliver: This is The Information Age. "Where is the wisdom we have lost in knowledge? Where is the knowledge we have lost in... information?"

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