Mysteriet på Greveholm
1996
Leif Olsson: There's a natural explanation for everything.
The Gnome: Yadda yadda, blah blah blah. I can't keep track of *all* details here. Just get it done!
Ivar Olsson: (about Måns' scooter) Have you ever gone faster than this? Måns, paperboy: Yeah, once. But the wind was in my back, and I had to take a leak.
(first lines) Måns, paperboy: Ghoooooooosts!
(Melitta reveals that Lillan knocked over an armor) Astrid Olsson: Oh, my God, that's horrible. Leif, does home insurance cover this? Leif Olsson: (calmly) We're not at home now.
Ivar Olsson: (showing his palm, which is transparent) Look, Lillan. Do you know what this is? Lillan Olsson: 'Course I do. It's ectoplasm. It's ghost mucus.
Spöket Staffan: The Count wanted the Princess to marry him, but she said that he wasn't her type, and disagreed. Ivar Olsson: (sarcastically) The Interest Club takes a note.
(Leif Olsson has fallen off the roof and is dangling forward and back in the cable he was trying to install) Ivar Olsson: (commenting on the TV) Now it's good... now it's bad... now it's good... now it's bad...
Leif Olsson: (carrying the parabole on his head) I'll be on the roof, kids. You keep things under control down here, right? Ivar Olsson: (saluting) Yes, Mr Chantarelle!
Melitta Olsson: But what if the Count makes a ghost out of you too, like he did with Jean and Staffan? Ivar Olsson: It's a risk I have to take.
Melitta Olsson: (about a ghost she just saw) It was like I could see through it... like a cheese with holes in it. Leif Olsson: (annoyed) Yesterday, it was an armor. Today, a cheese with holes. What's it gonna be tomorrow? A toothbrush that smokes the peace pipe or a baboon that does the tango?
Melitta Olsson: This is just like that Roxette video!
Melitta Olsson: (after kissing Måns) Ew! You're tongue is all gluey! Måns, paperboy: (lisping) Uh, yeah, that'th what happenth when you lick two thouthand thtampth.
Melitta Olsson: (about Dioda) How come she can't talk? Lillan Olsson: Well, she's been locked away for a long time, maybe she just forgot how to speak. Ivar Olsson: Yeah, I forget my English vocabulary in a week!
Ivar Olsson: (thinking) I have to talk to her. But what am I going to say? "Hi, handsome, you wanna hang out and play video games." No, not that! "What's a princess like you doing in a castle like this?" No, that's not good either! I know! "Do you want to come with me and read The Phantom?" No, no, no! Why does she have to be able to read my mind? Hey, wait! If I wear the saucepan over my head, she can't hear my thoughts! That's good. (puts saucepan on his head) (Princess Dioda walks in) Princess Dioda: Hi, Ivar. Why do you have that saucepan on your head? Ivar Olsson: (removes the saucepan and thinks to Dioda) Princess Dioda: What? ... "The Phantom", what's that? Ivar Olsson: Noo! That wasn't what I was supposed to think! Princess Dioda: What? Ivar Olsson: I was thinking I was going to think what I didn't think. So the thought that I thought was not the thought I was thinking about! Princess Dioda: Ivar... I have ears, too.
Ivar Olsson: (thinking) She's so good-looking! Princess Dioda: You look pretty good, too, Ivar. Ivar Olsson: (thinking) Huh! She can read my mind! This is so embarrassing!
Princess Dioda: I'm sorry about this, you've all been very nice to me. But I have to go home now. To the Milky Way. Leif Olsson: (solemnly) Yeah. What a pity we won't get to see any more of you.
Melitta Olsson: (to Ralf) Hey... you're friend's been to the bathroom for pretty long now, maybe we should go check on him? Astrid Olsson: Oh, God, please don't tell me the bathroom door's lock is jammed again! Leif, go check on it! Ralf, burglar: No! No. I mean, he's got a very big bladder. You never know how long he'll be in there. Sometimes he has to stand there for days and nights! Ivar Olsson: Hey, you just said his bladder was really small. Now you're saying it's big. Make up your mind! Ralf, burglar: Uh... yeah! You know, that's the thing with his bladder. Sometimes it's really really big, and then - suddenly! - it's small. Yeah, his bladder is a complete mystery, you never know where you have it.