Little Nicky
2000
Jimmy the Demon: Remember, at 4: 00 you have to shove a pineapple up Hitler's ass.
Deacon: The Lord loves you, and the Lord loves you. (to Nicky) You make the Lord very nervous.
Nicky: I'm from the South. The Deep South.
Nicky: Popeye's chicken is fuckin' awesome! Demon: Popeye's chicken is the shiznit!
Son: (about Nicky) Who's that man, Mommy? Mom: I dunno, but he sure is butt-ugly.
Townie: You can do it, Ozzy! Bite 'is freakin' head off!
Gatekeeper: Are there boobs on my head? Nicky: Yeah, big ones.
Nicky: Can I wash my winky in your kitchen sinky?
Valerie: Do it for the butterflies!
Peter: Drink up. Here's to fifty million clams. Adrian: To the defilement of Earth and the corruption of its people. Peter: Okay whatever, just drink it. Adrian: It's awfully hot down here. How do you manage to stay so cool? John: Uh, beer lowers the body temperature. I read that in a beer magazine. Adrian: This liquid would probably quench my thirst, cool me off. Peter: Definitely. John: It'll give you a pretty good buzz. Adrian: Or maybe it will trap me inside for all of eternity. John: Uh, no it won't.
Mr Beefy: Look, it's okay for me to shit in the street, but *you* gotta use a toilet.
Peter: Did you check out the dragon mouth? John: The Dark Prince is here!
Deacon: Why do you taunt me with your darkness? Your evil is stinkin' up our streets! The end is near! We are all gonna die!
John: Hail, Nicky! Peter: We are forever your slaves!
Valerie: Nicky! Nicky: Valerie! Valerie: What are you doing? Nicky: I think I'm floating. Valerie: Why would you be floating? Nicky: Maybe it's because of this cake I ate earlier.
Deacon: The Hell Beast is above us and I can smell his evil slut!
Nicky: That's not me! That's that cockroach Tony Montana!
Mr Beefy: (shoots an arrow out of his penis and hits Adrian) Now that hurt the both of us.
Nicky: (after going to heaven) What is this? Is it Dad's birthday?
Nicky: So where did you meet Dad? Holly: It was a long time ago at this heaven/hell mixer. Christa: I remember that night. You had like four daiquiris.
Adrian: Welcome to the party! It's so nice to see you all here! I'm so proud of you. You've taken to sin with so minimal prompting. You're acting as if there is no heaven or hell. Well, I've got news for you. There is most definitely a hell and you're all gonna go there when you die. Which is in about 15 minutes. Deacon: Holy shit! We really are gonna die!
Adrian: I'm going to kill you with my bare hands. Nicky: I'm ready for ya'. (Adrian punches Nicky) Nicky: I guess I wasn't ready.
Jenna: That guy is still the biggest horndog.
Peeper: I deserve this! I deserve this!
Lucifer: Even in hell I get no respect.
Mr Beefy: You changed a Coke into a Pepsi?
Townie: You can do it Nicky! Kick him in his hairy balls!
Chubbs: You mambo? Nicky: No, I don't think so. Chubbs: It's all in the hips, it's all in the hips, it's all in the hips...
Nicky: Get in the flask! Popeye's Cashier: What're you talkin' about, man? Nicky: I'm talkin' about an 8-piece, let's go!
Nicky: I never been to Earth, Dad! I never even slept over some other dude's house!
Jimmy the Demon: You were gone ten seconds, what happened? Nicky: I was hit by this big light that was attached to a lot of metal. Satan: That was a train, son, don't stand in front of them. Nicky: Well, I'll have to take a mulligan on this one.
Adrian: Grandpa Lucifer always said it was better to rule in Hell than to serve in Heaven. Well, I'm tired of serving in Hell.
Christa: God's so smart. Jenna: Yeah, like Jeopardy smart.
Mr Beefy: You love acting, I love pissing.
Lucifer: The last time I saw a pair of jugs that big, a pair of hillbillies were blowing on them.
Adrian: I hear a train a-comin'!
Mom: Now *that* was some straight-up David Copperfield shit!
Nicky: Good luck with the nipple rubbing! Nipples: (rubbing nipples) I don't need luck! I'm gooood!
John: Hey, Nicky, can you tell us what Ozzy's tryin' to say here? Nicky: Well, Ozzy, was always very straight forward with his message, but wrap your minds around this. (Pulls out a Chicago album) Todd: I love Chicago. (Nicky plays the album backwards -"I command you, in the name of Lucifer, the spill the blood of the innocent... ") Peter: Wow! Chicago kicks ass!
Holly: Adrian may be smarter than you. He may be stronger than you. But, you have one thing he doesn't. Nicky: A speech impediment?
Nicky: Yo, fossil-head! I got a bone to pick with you!
Valerie: Wanna blizm with my bliz blob?
Mr Beefy: Yeah I had a weak back... about a week back! Ahahahaha!
Adrian: I've come to tell you that you are in for 10,000 years of suffering. You will see the most horrific things... (stops... sees Nipples dancing erotically) Adrian: Well... not that horrible... but still pretty bad... (looks away)
Nicky: You want a pillow fight, do ya? then let's let the feathers fly!