Jaws
1975
Hooper: I'm not going to waste my time arguing with a man who's lining up to be a hot lunch.
Quint: Y'all know me. Know how I earn a livin'. I'll catch this bird for you, but it ain't gonna be easy. Bad fish. Not like going down to the pond and chasing bluegills and tommycocks. This shark, swallow you whole. No shakin', no tenderizin', down you go. And we gotta do it quick, that'll bring back your tourists, put all your businesses on a payin' basis. But it's not gonna be pleasant. I value my neck a lot more than three thousand bucks, chief. I'll find him for three, but I'll catch him, and kill him, for ten. But you've gotta make up your minds. If you want to stay alive, then ante up. If you want to play it cheap, be on welfare the whole winter. I don't want no volunteers, I don't want no mates, there's too many captains on this island. Ten thousand dollars for me by myself. For that you get the head, the tail, the whole damn thing.
Mayor Vaughn: Fellows, let's be reasonable, huh? This is not the time or the place to perform some kind of a half-assed autopsy on a fish... And I'm not going to stand here and see that thing cut open and see that little Kintner boy spill out all over the dock.
Quint: (singing) Farewell and adieu to you fair Spanish ladies / Farewell and adieu you ladies of Spain. / For we received orders for to sail back to Boston / And soon never more will we see you again.
Mayor Vaughn: Martin, it's all psychological. You yell barracuda, everybody says, "Huh? What?" You yell shark, we've got a panic on our hands on the Fourth of July.
Quint: You go in the cage, cage goes in the water, you go in the water. Shark's in the water, our shark.
Hooper: You were on the Indianapolis? Brody: What happened? Quint: Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into her side, Chief. We was comin' back from the island of Tinian to Leyte. We'd just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in 12 minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half-hour. Tiger. 13-footer. You know how you know that in the water, Chief? You can tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. What we didn't know, was that our bomb mission was so secret, no distress signal had been sent. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, Chief, sharks come cruisin' by, so we formed ourselves into tight groups. It was sorta like you see in the calendars, you know the infantry squares in the old calendars like the Battle of Waterloo and the idea was the shark come to the nearest man, that man he starts poundin' and hollerin' and sometimes that shark he go away... but sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark looks right at ya. Right into your eyes. And the thing about a shark is he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, he doesn't even seem to be livin'... 'til he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then... ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin'. The ocean turns red, and despite all your poundin' and your hollerin' those sharks come in and... they rip you to pieces. You know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men. I don't know how many sharks there were, maybe a thousand. I do know how many men, they averaged six an hour. Thursday mornin', Chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player. Boson's mate. I thought he was asleep. I reached over to wake him up. He bobbed up, down in the water, he was like a kinda top. Upended. Well, he'd been bitten in half below the waist. At noon on the fifth day, a Lockheed Ventura swung in low and he spotted us, a young pilot, lot younger than Mr Hooper here, anyway he spotted us and a few hours later a big ol' fat PBY come down and started to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened. Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went into the water. 316 men come out, the sharks took the rest, June the 29th, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb.
Sean Brody: Get out of the water!
Ben Gardner: When we get them silly bastards down in that rock pile, it'll be some fun, they'll wish their fathers had never met their mothers. When they start takin' their bottoms out and slamming into them rocks, boy! Get away from there, ya goddamn fool, you! What's the matter with you? You wanna swamp us, ya crazy son of a bitch?
Hooper: Hello. Ben Gardner: Hello back... young feller. How are ya? Say I hope you not going out with those nuts, are ya?
Brody: You're gonna need a bigger boat...
Hooper: You know those eight guys in the fantail launch out there? Well, none of 'em are gonna get out of the harbor alive.
Christine 'Chrissie' Watkins: Come on into the water!
(first lines) Tom Cassidy: What's your name again? Christine 'Chrissie' Watkins: Chrissie. Tom Cassidy: Where are we going? Christine 'Chrissie' Watkins: Swimming
Ellen Brody: Excuse me, but what are you talking about? Didn't they catch the shark this afternoon? It was on the Cape station news. Hooper: They caught a shark, not the shark. Big difference. I could've proved it this afternoon, by cutting that one open and examining his stomach contents. Also, his bite was too small.
Hooper: (to Brody) Please don't smoke. (Returns to post-mortem) With minor post-mortem lacerations and abrasions. Bite marks indicate typical non- frenzy feeding pattern of large squali, possibly carchaninus lonimanus, or isurus glaucas. Gross tissue loss and post-mortem erosion of bite surfaces prevent detailed analysis; however, teeth and jaws of the attacking squali must be considered above average for these waters.
Brody: What day is this? Hooper: Wednesday... No, it's Tuesday, I think. Brody: Think the tide's with us? Hooper: Just keep kicking. Brody: Y'know, I used to hate the water... Hooper: I can't imagine why.
Mayor Vaughn: What kind of a shark did you say it was? Hooper: Carcaradon carcharias. A Great White.
Hooper: What we are dealing with is a perfect engine, an eating machine. It's really a miracle of evolution. All this machine does is swim and eat and makes little sharks, and that's all. Now, why don't you take a long look at this sign. Those proportions are correct. Mayor Vaughn: Love to prove that, wouldn't ya? Get your name into the National Geographic.
Quint: (before leaving dock) Break it up will ya' Chief! Daylights a wastin'.
Quint: (trying to hurry Brody into the boat) Come on Chief, this isn't no boy scout picnic. See ya' got ya' rubbers! (Quint laughs wildly)
Quint: (talking Brody through making knots) Little brown eel comes out of the cave... Swims into the hold... Comes out of the hold... Goes back into the cave again... It's not too good is it Chief? (Refering to Brody's messed up knot)
Hooper: (motioning to Brody to get closer to the barrels) Come on Martin! Move, move, move! Brody: I'm not going out there! Hooper: Beyond the edge of the barrels, go to the end of the barrels! Further out! Brody: What? Hooper: Go further out! Brody: What for? Hooper: Will you go to the end of the pulpit please? Please go to the end of the pulpit! Brody: What for? Hooper: I need something in the foreground to give it some scale Brody: Foreground my ass!
Hooper: He ate the light.
Hooper: ha,ha-they're all gonna die.
Hooper: That's a twenty footer. Quint: Twenty-five. Three tons of him.
Brody: I can do anything, I'm the chief of police.
Hooper: This was no boat accident.
Hooper: Didn't you get on a boat and check out these waters? Brody: No. Hooper: Well this is not a boat accident. It wasn't any propeller, it wasn't any coral reef, and it wasn't Jack the Ripper. It was a shark.
Quint: You've got city boy hands, Hooper. You been countin' money all your life. Hooper: I don't need this working-class-hero crap.
Brody: You're gonna need a bigger boat.
Brody: It doesn't make any sense when you pay a guy like you to watch sharks. Hooper: Well, uh, it doesn't make much sense for a guy who hates the water to live on an island either. Brody: It's only an island if you look at it from the water. Hooper: That makes a lot of sense.
Ellen Brody: (upon meeting Matt Hooper) My husband tells me you're in sharks.
Mayor Vaughn: I don't think either of you are familiar with our problems. Hooper: I think that I am familiar with the fact that you are going to ignore this particular problem until it swims up and bites you on the ass.
Hooper: Mr Vaughan, what we are dealing with here is a perfect engine, er... an eating machine. It's really a miracle of evolution. All this machine does is swim and eat and make little sharks and that's all.
Quint: Here's to swimmin' with bow-legged women.
Quint: Here lies the body of Mary Lee; died at the age of a hundred and three. For fifteen years she kept her viginity; not a bad record for this vicinity.
Quint: I know a taxidermy man back home. He gonna have a heart attack when he see what I brung him.
Brody: "Slow ahead." I can go slow ahead. Come on down here and chum some of this shit.
Quint: The thing about a shark, it's got lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eyes. When it comes at you it doesn't seem to be livin'... until he bites you, and those black eyes roll over white.
Brody: Smile you son of a BITCH.
(last lines) Brody: I used to hate the water. Hooper: I can't imagine why.
Mayor Vaughn: We have caught and killed a large predator that supposedly injured some bathers.
Quint: (seeing Hooper's equipment) What are you? Some kind of half-assed astronaut? (examining the shark cage) Quint: Jesus H Christ, when I was a boy, every little squirt wanted to be a harpooner or a sword fisherman. What d'ya have there - a portable shower or a monkey cage? Hooper: Anti-Shark cage. Quint: Anti-shark cage. You go inside the cage? (Hooper nods) Quint: Cage goes in the water, you go in the water. Shark's in the water. Our shark. (sings) Quint: Farewell and adieu to you, fair Spanish ladies. Farewell and adieu, you ladies of Spain. For we've received orders for to sail back to Boston. And so nevermore shall we see you again.
Quint: Front, bow. Back, stern. If ya don't get it right, squirt, I throw your ass out the little round window on the side.
Ellen Brody: Martin hated the water. He won't go in the water and he sits in the car when we go on the ferry to the mainland. There's a clinical name for what he has, I think it's... Brody: Drowning.
Hooper: Fast fish.
Brody: That's some bad hat, Harry.
Quint: Hooper ya idiot. Starboard. Aint you watchin' it?
Pratt: I'll stuff your friggin' head in there, man, and find out whether or not it's a man-eater.
Mayor Vaughn: Any special questions? Denherder: Uh, is that $3000 bounty on the shark in cash or check? (the townspeople laugh) Mrs Taft: I don't think that's funny. I don't think that's funny at all, I'm sorry.
Hooper: Ah. Just like I thought... He came up with the Gulf Stream - from southern waters. (He pulls a Louisiana license plate from the shark. Brody examines it) Brody: He didn't eat a car, did he?
Brody: What are you doing? These are your people out there. Hendricks: Those aren't my people. Did you see all the license plates out in the parking lot? Connecticut, Rhode Island, New Jersey... I'm all by myself out there.
Quint: (Poking fun at Brody) Ah, the missus, Chief. If they don't like you going out, they'll love you comin' in.
(as Brody sends the air tanks flying) Hooper: Dammit, Martin! This is compressed air! Brody: Well, what the hell kind of a knot was that? Hooper: You pulled the wrong one. You screw around with these tanks, and they're gonna blow up! Quint: Yeah, that's real fine expensive gear you brought out here, Mr Hooper. 'Course I don't know what that bastard shark's gonna do with it, might eat it I suppose. Seen one eat a rockin' chair one time. Hey chieffy, next time you just ask me which line to pull, right?
Brody: Take this stuff back to the office and get to work on those signs. "Beaches Closed - No Swimming. By the Order of the Amity PD". And let Polly do the printing. Hendricks: What's the matter with my printing?
Mayor Vaughn: I'm only trying to say that Amity is a summer town. We need summer dollars. Now, if the people can't swim here, they'll be glad to swim at the beaches of Cape Cod, the Hamptons, Long Island... Brody: That doesn't mean we have to serve them up a smorgasbord.
Hendricks: So then Denherder and Charlie sat there trying to catch their breath - and to figure out how to tell Charlie's wife what happened to her freezer full of meat. Brody: That's not funny. That's not funny at all.
Quint: (On radio) Your husband's fine, Mrs Brody. He's fishing. He's just caught a couple of stripers. We'll bring 'em in for dinner. We won't be long, we haven't seen anything yet. Over and out.
Brody: (Drunk) I tell ya, the crime rate in New York'll kill you. There's so many problems, you never feel like you're accomplishing anything. Violence, rip-offs, muggings... Kids can't leave the house - you've gotta walk them to school. But in Amity one man can make a difference. Do you know, in twenty-five years, there's never been a shooting or a murder in this town. Hooper: Fascinating. Want a pretzel? Brody: Where are we?
Brody: Yeah, but I'm not drunk enough to go out on a boat. Hooper: Yes, you are. Brody: No, I'm not. Hooper: Yes, you are. Brody: I can't do that. Hooper: Yes, you can.
Ellen Brody: Wanna get drunk and fool around? Brody: Oh Yeah.
(about to go looking for the shark) Brody: On the water? Hooper: Well, if we're looking for a shark we're not gonna find it on the land.
Hooper: Boys, oh boys... I think he's come back for his noon feeding.
Quint: (as he spots Hooper sitting on the deck playing solitaire) Stop playin' with yourself, Hooper.
Matt Hooper: You know those eight guys in the fantail launch out there? Well, none of 'em are gonna get out of the harbor alive.
Quint: (referring to a cut on Brody's head) Don't worry about it Chief, it ain't permanent. Wanna see somethin' permanent, boom-boom-boom? (Quint pulls out a false front tooth) Hooper: (to Quint) I got that beat. (to Brody) Hooper: I got that beat.
Quint: I'll drink to your leg. Hooper: I'll drink to your leg. Quint: Okay, we'll drink to our legs! (laughs)
Hooper: (points to a scar on chest) Mary Ellen Moffat. She broke my heart. (Hooper, Broday and Quint all laugh)
Hooper: (singing) Show me the way to go home / I'm tired and I want to go t o bed Quint, Brody and Hooper: (all singing together) I had a little drink about an hour ago and it went right to my head / Wherever I may roam, by land or sea or foam...
Hooper: (trying to get the fishing line secure) It may be a marlin or a tuna... but it's definitely a game fish. (Hooper pulls as the lines snaps and he crashes his head into the wall) Quint: (picking up the line) Gamin' fish eh? Marlin? Stingray? Bit through this piano wire? Don't you tell me my business again! Now you get up on the bridge... Hooper: Quint, that doesn't prove a damn thing! Quint: Well it proves one thing Mr Hooper. It proves that you wealthy college boys don't have the education enough to admit when you're wrong. (Quint enters the cabin as Hooper makes faces at him) Brody: (following Quint inside the boat) What's the point? Hooks and lines... Quint: (slams on the roof at Hooper) Hooper! 12 minutes south south east now, full throttle! Hooper: (Mocking Pirate Voice) Aye, aye, sir! AYE JIMBOY ARAGHHH! Quint: (to Brody) See what I do Chief is I trick 'em up to the surface. And jab at 'em. I ain't gonna haul 'em up like a lot of catfish. (slams on the roof) Quint: Hooper, full throttle! Hooper: (Pirate Voice) I don't have to take this abuse much longer!
Quint: Hooper, what exactly can you do with these things of yours? Hooper: Well, I think I can pump around 20 cc's of strictnine nitrate into him, that is if I can get close enough. Quint: Get this little needle through his skin? Hooper: No, I can't do that. But, if I can get him close enough to this cage, I think that I can get him in the mouth or the eye... Brody: That shark will tear that cage to pieces! Hooper: YOU GOT ANY BETTER SUGGESTIONS?
Ellen Brody: You see the kids? Brody: (looking out the window) They must be in the back yard. Ellen Brody: In Amity, you say "yahd". Brody: (starting out of the bedroom, speaking with a bad New-England accent) They're in the "yahd", not too "fah" from the "cah". (looks back at Ellen) How's that? Ellen Brody: Like you're from New York.
Christine 'Chrissie' Watkins: GOD HELP ME!
Brody: You're certifiable, Quint! You know that? Quint: Yeah, yeah, yeah...