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It's Pat

1994

Hood: So, what we wanna know is are you a brotha or a sista? Pat: Well, I'm an only child...

(Pat falls down a flight of stairs) Kyle Jacobs: Are you all right... um... um... you there? Chris: Yeah, hon. Did you break anything? Pat Riley: Oh, I crushed my nuts! Kyle Jacobs: Ooooh, that's got to hurt! Pat Riley: Oh, shoot! (holding up crushed walnuts) There goes my afternoon snack!

Pat Riley: Howdy, Tippy! Tippy: Oh... oh Pat... what do you want? Pat Riley: Well I just thought I'd stop by and pick up a few personal items. Tippy: Oh no no no, please, remember? No, I don't want to know anything about your... your sex life, okay? Pat Riley: I just want to get a few toiletries. Uh, first of all, I need some protection... Tippy: Oh dear God, okay, all right. Pat Riley: ... from underarm wetness. I'm never one to offend! Tippy: 2.50 then, all right, and you're out... Pat Riley: What am I, in a race? Whoa! Tippy: Well, kind of, uh... Pat Riley: And I need a lubricant... Tippy: What? Pat Riley: ... for my eyes. They're drying up due to the pollen and dust in the air. Tippy: Oh great, help me, somebody please help me! Pat Riley: And I need some feminine napkins... Tippy: Oh, I'm in hell... I am in hell now! Pat Riley: You never know when Aunt Wilma's gonna stop by for lunch!

Pat: I played with the Ween!

Chris: I find everything about you... endlessly fascinating. Pat Riley: Join the club!

Groupie: You were great tonight, Pat. Pat Riley: Oh, you thought so to?

Pat Riley: So... did I tell you I'm unemployed? Kathy Griffin: Yea, uh, about 400 times. Pat Riley: Say, do you think you could make an announcement about it at the radio station? Kathy Griffin: Absolutely not. Pat Riley: Ok, well think about it, but when you do make the announcement let me know. I want to tell my friends to tune in. They don't listen to your show normally.

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