It Happened One Night
1934
Ellie: Your ego is absolutely colossal. Peter Warne: Yeah, yeah, not bad, how's yours? (Shuts and locks the door) Ellie: You know, compared to you, my friend Shapeley is an amateur. Just whatever gave you any idea I'd stand for this? Peter Warne: Hey now, wait a minute. Let's get this straightened out right now. If you're nursing any silly notion that I'm interested in you, forget it. You're just a headline to me. Ellie: A headline? You're not a newspaper man are you? Peter Warne: Chalk up one for your side.
Alexander Andrews: Oh, er, do you mind if I ask you a question, frankly? Do you love my daughter? Peter Warne: Any guy that'd fall in love with your daughter ought to have his head examined. Alexander Andrews: Now that's an evasion! Peter Warne: She picked herself a perfect running mate - King Westley - the pill of the century! What she needs is a guy that'd take a sock at her once a day, whether it's coming to her or not. If you had half the brains you're supposed to have, you'd done it yourself, long ago. Alexander Andrews: Do you love her? Peter Warne: A normal human being couldn't live under the same roof with her without going nutty! She's my idea of nothing! Alexander Andrews: I asked you a simple question! Do you love her? Peter Warne: YES! But don't hold that against me, I'm a little screwy myself!
Oscar Shapeley: You know, there's nothing I like better than to meet a high-class mama that can snap back at you, 'cause the colder they are, the hotter they get! That's what I always say, yes sir! When a cold mama gets hot, boy, how she sizzles!
(after Ellen stops a car by showing her leg) Peter Warne: Why didn't you take off all your clothes? You could have stopped forty cars. Ellie: Well, ooo, I'll remember that when we need forty cars.
Peter Warne: I never did like the idea of sitting on newspaper. I did it once, and all the headlines came off on my white pants. On the level! It actually happened. Nobody bought a paper that day. They just followed me around over town and read the news on the seat of my pants.
Ellie: By the way, what's your name? Peter Warne: What's that? Ellie: Who are you? Peter Warne: Who me? (smiling) I'm the whippoorwill that cries in the night. I'm the soft morning breeze that caresses your lovely face. Ellie: You've got a name, haven't you? Peter Warne: Yeah, I got a name. Peter Warne. Ellie: Peter Warne. I don't like it. Peter Warne: Don't let it bother you. You're giving it back to me in the morning. Ellie: Pleased to meet you, Mr Warne. Peter Warne: The pleasure is all mine, Mrs Warne.
Peter Warne: Excuse me lady, but that upon which you sit is mine. Ellie: I beg your pardon?
Alexander Andrews: Don't fall out of any windows!
Ellie: I'll stop that car, and I won't use my thumb!
Ellie: Well, I proved once and for all that the limb is mightier than the thumb.
Alexander Andrews: What's the matter, child? Aren't you happy? (Ellie clutches her father, sobbing) I thought so. I knew there was something on your mind. There, there, there now. What's the matter? You haven't fallen in love with someone else, have you? Have you? (Ellie continues crying) I haven't seen you cry since you were a baby. This must be serious. Where did you meet him? Ellie: On the road. Alexander Andrews: Now, don't tell me you've fallen in love with a bus driver.
Alexander Andrews: (Alexander has figured out Ellie is in love with another man) Who is he? Ellie: I don't know very much about him, except that I love him. Alexander Andrews: Well, if it's as serious as all that, we'll move Heaven and Earth to - Ellie: No, it's no use! He despises me. Alexander Andrews: Oh, come now. Ellie: Yes, he does! He despises everything about me. He says that I'm spoiled and selfish, and pampered, and thoroughly insincere. Alexander Andrews: Oh, ridiculous! Ellie: He doesn't think so much of you, either. Alexander Andrews: Well, I... Ellie: He blames you for everything that's wrong with me. He says you raised me stupidly. Alexander Andrews: (sarcastically) Now, that's a fine man to fall in love with. Ellie: Oh, he's marvelous!
Peter Warne: (Detectives are looking for Ellie) What do you mean, coming in here? What do you want, anyway? Detective: We're looking for somebody. Peter Warne: Yeah, well look your head off, but don't come busting in here. This isn't a public park. I could near as take a sock at you! Detective: Take it easy, son, take it easy. Mr Dykes: These men are detectives, Mr Warne. Peter Warne: I don't care if they're the whole police department. They can't come busting in here, shooting questions at my wife. Ellie: Now, don't get so excited, Peter. The man just asked a civil question. Peter Warne: Oh, is that so? Say, how many times have I told you to stop butting in when I'm having an argument? Ellie: Well, you don't have to lose your temper! Peter Warne: (mockingly) "You don't have to lose your temper." That's what you said the other time, too. Every time I try to protect you. The other night, at the Elks Dance, when that big Swede made a pass at you! Ellie: He didn't make a pass at me! I told you a million times! Peter Warne: Oh, no? I saw him. He kept pawing you all over the dance floor! Ellie: (the detectives stand there, flustered) He didn't! You were drunk! Peter Warne: Aw, nuts! You're just like your old man! Once a plumber's daughter, always a plumbers daughter! There isn't an ounce of brains in your whole family! Ellie: (sobbing) Oh, Peter Warne, you've gone far enough! I won't stand for it anymore! Peter Warne: Aw, shut up! Mr Dykes: Now, you see what you've done? Detective: Sorry, Mr Warne. But, you see we've got to check up on everybody. Detective: We're looking for a girl by the name of Ellen Andrews, you know, the daughter of that big Wall Street mug. Peter Warne: Yeah? Well, it's too bad you aren't looking for a plumber's daughter (to Ellie) QUIT BAWLING! QUIT BAWLING! (Ellie sobs even louder) Mr Dykes: I told you they were a perfectly nice married couple. (Mr Dykes and the detectives leave, and Peter and Ellie start laughing)