Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey
1993
(At the vet, having porcupine quills removed) Chance: Okay, okay, I'll talk! I left a gift on the carpet. I let Sassy take the rap for when I unrolled the toilet paper all over the house. I stole underwear on three occasions. (the vet yanks a quill out of his face) Okay, okay, four!
Fat Guy: Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty. Sassy: "Here, kitty kitty kitty." Not on your life, chubby. Fat Guy: Here, kitty kitty. Here, kitty. Here, kitty kitty kitty. Sassy: No, dummy dummy dummy dummy.
Shadow: Chance, you're a genius! Chance: No, I'm not! Uh, what's a genius? Shadow: Never mind.
Shadow: You've learned all you need to know, Chance. Now all you need to learn is how to say goodbye.
(Chance sees a porcupine, but he doesn't know what it is) Sassy: What is that? Chance: I don't know. It's probably a squirrel having a really bad hair day.
Chance: I can't believe I'm running from a cat! Shadow: I won't tell if you won't. Chance: Of course, this isn't your ordinary housecat. This is like Arnold Schwarzen-kitty!
Chance: Remember hot dogs, Shadow? Shadow: Yeah, I wasn't much for the name, though. Chance: I don't think they're really made of dog. Shadow: I don't think they're made of meat!
Sassy: Like my mother always said, curiosity killed the dog.
Chance: I'm too pooped to poop.
Chance: Shadow was loyal, Shadow was faithful... Shadow was a chump.
Shadow: I thought you were gonna stay, pup. Chance: Yeah, but I thought I should come along, in case you two needed protection. Sassy: My hero! Guess I'm gonna have to stare at YOUR butt the whole way.
(Chance has just gotten attacked by a porcupine) Chance: Ah! He bit me with his butt!
Sassy: It's like I said all along, poopsie: cats rule and dogs drool. Chance: Oh, get a life. Get nine of 'em. Sassy: But it's true. Cats are smarter than dogs, and more attractive... and we don't drink from the toilet!
(Chance lets a rabbit run away) Chance: I hate fast food.
(Chance is chewing on an old boot) Sassy: Do you have any idea where that's been? Chance: Yeahhh. That's why I like it. You want some? Sassy: I'm not really into leather.
Sassy: You just woke me up from a very deep catnap. Chance: What's the matter, Sassy? Get up on the wrong side of the litter box? Sassy: Even a great beauty needs her beauty sleep! Chance: Beauty sleep? You'd have to sleep for, like, a month!
(Chance is chewing apart an old shirt) Sassy: Chance, stop! The blouse is dead!
Sassy: Chance, stop! The blouse is dead! Chance: That's right! And I have to shred it into teeny, tiny little pieces and I - (gulps) - I swallowed a button. Sassy: Oh, what a shame... Too bad it wasn't a zipper! Chance: Hey, you better beat it powder puff before I turn you into dog meat! Sassy: Oh, is that any way to speak to a petite dewdrop... you big flat-faced butt-sniffer? (Chance barks and chases Sassy)
Chance: (sees a real live Turkey for a second time) Ahhh! Birdzilla returns
Chance: (Chance is riding with his head out the car window) Da Daaaa Bat Dog!
Chance: Turkey! Turkey turkey turkey turkey!
Shadow: (Shadow watches Chance chase a rabbit) There goes the bunny... There goes the pup... There goes breakfast.
Chance: (seeing a poop) Wow! That's as big as Sassy! Sassy: Thanks, precious. Chance: Only it smells better! Sassy: At least I don't roll in it like some species!
Chance: Well, look who's down in the dirt with the dogs.
Chance: I can do better! Just give me a second chance! Shadow: That was your second chance, Chance! Chance: Then give me a third chance!
Shadow: Something doesn't smell right. Chance: Wake up and smell the kibble.
Chance: (after discovering a skunk in a hollow log) Hey, Shadow, you want to have some fun? Stick your head into that log.
Sassy: Are you calling me slow? Chance: Of course not... for a hippopotamus.
Chance: (encounters a grizzly bear) What is this? (the bear growls) Uh... gosh, you look hungry.
Sassy: (chased by the fat guy) This way, Thunder Butt.
1st Dog at Pound: Hey, pussy cat! 2nd Dog at Pound: Yeah! Shake that tail, baby! Sassy: Oh, great. Cat calls.
Chance: You were so awesome. You were like Rin Tin Tin. Shadow: What? Chance: Rin Tin Tin. Don't you ever watch TV?
Chance: (catapults the mountain lion) Hasta la vista, Kitty!
Chance: Are we going in circles? That tree smells familiar. Shadow: It's pine, Chance.
Sassy: (the animals are re-united and running towards each other) Chance! Shadow! Chance: Sassy! (nearly steps in a hole) Whoa, gopher hole!
Hope Burnford: Want some Shrimp? Sassy: No, I couldn't. Hope Burnford: But you like Shrimp. Sassy: Yeah, well, I've still got those four pesky ounces still hanging on from last Christmas.
Sassy: (as Hope's giving Sassy a particularly tight hug) Hope, honey, Sassy can't breathe.
Sassy: (after Chance uses a see-saw to launch Sassy into the sandbox) He threw me in the big litterbox!
Jamie Seaver: (watching Chance vomit) That's Grandma's cake!
Sassy: (seeing Chance eat greedily) I feel I'm going to be sick (as Chance starts eating her unwanted food) Hey, now, *stop* it, that's *mine* Chance: Yeah well, you snooze, you lose! Sassy: Ugh! Canines!
Chance: (eating a shoe and talking to Shadow) Why don't you relax, Gramps? (with mouth full) Have yourself a shoe! Shadow: (tuts in disgust) Pups! Sassy: Have you any idea where that's been? Chance: Oh, yeah. That's why I love it