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I Ought to Be in Pictures

1982

Libby: Grandma was right. Once a shitheel, always a shitheel. Herbert: Your grandmother talks like that? Libby: The words are mine, the wisdom is hers!

Libby: (cursing in Spanish) ... and your father too, you shitheel! Truck Driver: Spanish? Libby: No, Jew, but in Brooklyn first we learn Spanish then English

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I Wake Up Screaming

1941

Lady Handel: How old are you, anyway? Robin Ray: That, my dear Lady Handel, is a secret that I keep even from my own mother.

Robin Ray: Women are all alike! Larry Evans: For Pete's sake, what difference does that make? You've got to have them, they're standard equipment.

Jill Lynn: What's the good of living without hope? Ed Cornell: It can be done.

Ed Cornell: When I get all my evidence together, I'm gonna have you tied up like a pig in a slaughterhouse.

Ed Cornell: I'll follow you into your grave. I'll write my name on your tombstone.

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I Want to Marry Ryan Banks

2004 (TV)

Ryan Banks: (to Japanese waitress) A couple of dragon rolls, definately. Thanks. Charlie Norton: (to waitress) You know, I would like a Chinese chicken salad. Ryan Banks: Charlie, this is a Japanese restaurant. Charlie Norton: Uh, yeah. (to waitress) Could you make sure the chicken isn't cooked in oil, the lettuce is triple washed and the dressing is egg free?

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I Was a Teenage Werewolf

1957

Dr Hugo Wagner: But you're sacrificing a human life! Dr Alfred Brandon: Do you cry over a guinea pig? This boy is a free police case. We're probably saving him from the gas chamber. Dr Hugo Wagner: But the boy is so young, the transformation horrible - Dr Alfred Brandon: And you call yourself a scientist! That's why you've never been more than an assistant.

Det. Sgt. Donovan: It's not for man to interfere in the ways of God.

Dr Alfred Brandon: I'm going to TRANSFORM him, and unleash the savage instincts that lie hidden within... and then I'll be judged the benefactor. Mankind is on the verge of destroying itself. The only hope for the human race is to hurl it back into its primitive norm, to start all over again. What's one life compared to such a triumph?

Bill Logan: You've gotta *bow* to authority!

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In weiter Ferne, so nah!

1993

Cassiel: Why can't I be good? Why can't I act like a man? Why can't I act like other men can? Lou Reed: If I knew, I would tell you. Hang in there.

Emit Flesti: Have you heard the prophecy? "In the Year of Hate, when all that is foreign is despised, dark riders will enter the harbor, seize the ship and everyone on it and sail them straight into hell" Cassiel: I know all prophecy, but not this one. You made it up. Emit Flesti: What's the difference? It just happened.

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Invaders from Mars

1953

Mary MacLean: (waking up) What is it? George MacLean: Well, ah, David says something landed in the field out back. It doesn't make sense, but he seems so convinced. Mary MacLean: What do you mean "land"? George MacLean: Well, he says he saw a bright light or something. He's not the type of boy that given to imagining things. After all the work at the plant is secret. And we have orders to report anything unusual. And there have been rumors. Mary MacLean: Rumors? George MacLean: Oh, Dear, you know I can't talk about it.

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Invigningen

2002 (V)

Landshvdingen: (the county govenor practises his speach) Think of it... like a party for your grandfather.

Landshvdingen: What's the meaning with the things I say? It's more like, fly, fly pigeon, fly.

Landshvdingen: Nixon, now there's a man. Almost as much a man, as Thatcher.

Landshvdingen: Friends... My friends... No. Ladies and gentlemen. (pause) Pigs... (laugh) No, I can't say pigs.

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Invisible Man

1958

(first lines of series) Dr Peter Brady: My name is Peter Brady. For some time now, I've been engaged in highly secret experiments designed to bring about a great step forward in man's conquest of space and time. Here in my lab, working night and day, I've been prying into the mysteries of the future. Only a few hours ago I felt that there were secrets that would never be known here on Earth. And then suddenly, in the midst of routine experiments, a strange and unpredicted event took place. Whether a mistake or the natural conclusion of the experiment I cannot say. I can say that what happened is one of the most fantastic experiences in our modern day.

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Iria: Zeiram the Animation

1993 (V)

Bob: Like brother, like sister. How'd that ever happen?

Fujikuro: Women should wear make-up not men's hair braids!

Gren: Bob, the hijacker is that immortal hat-headed bastard and he's just as weird as the rumors said he was. (shoots Zeiram with no effect) Gren: And as nerve-dead too.

Gren: (repeated line) They brought a real monster on to this ship.

(being chased by sentries) Fujikuro: SHIT! I can't take any more of this!

(Kei falls on Iria and feels her breast) Kei: Soft. Iria: You don't say.

Iria: Take me to Teddan Teppadi. Fujikuro: No! I'm not your goddamn chauffeur!

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Irreconcilable Differences

1984

Casey Brodsky: I'm just a kid, and I don't know what I'm doing sometimes. But I think you should know better when you're all grown up. I think you should know how to act, and how to treat people. And I think if you once loved someone enough to marry them, you should at least be nice to them, even if you don't love 'em any more. And I think if you have a child, you should treat that child like a human being and not like a pet. Not like you treat your dog or somethin'. You know, when you have a dog sometimes you forget he's there, and then when you get lonely suddenly you remember him, and you remember how cute he is and stuff, and you kiss him a lot, but then the next day when you're busy again you don't notice him. That's how I've been treated for the past 4 years, and you don't treat your kid like your dog. It's not right.

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Isadora

1968

Isadora Duncan: A man's looks have nothing to do with his success as a lover.

Isadora Duncan: (learning Russian) Honestly, I don't want to talk about red pencils with Essenin. I want to talk to him about making love with me. Now, how do say in Russian, "I adore you. You have beautiful thighs"?

Isadora Duncan: I'm not after my fortune. I'm after my destiny.

Isadora Duncan: (about America) You were once wild here. Don't let them tame you.

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Isis

1975

Isis: Oh Zephyr Winds which blow on high, lift me now so I can fly!

Andrea Thomas: O mighty Isis!

Narrator: With this amulet you and your descendants are endowed by the goddess Isis with the powers of the animals and the elements. You will soar as the falcon soars, run with the speed of gazelles and command the elements of sky and earth.

Narrator: And so, unknown even to her closest friends, Rick Mason and Cindy Lee, she became a dual person: Andrea Thomas, teacher; and Isis, dedicated foe of evil, defender of the weak, champion of truth and justice!

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Island at War

2004 (mini)

(Leutnant Walker has invited Zelda to have a drink with him in a pub) Zelda Kay: You think I'm friendly? Leutnant Walker: Well, you're drinking with me. Zelda Kay: And you're paying. I'm merely observing an alien species - much as one goes to the zoo.

Oberleutnant Flach: (ironically) Inconvenient, isn't it, war?

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Island of Lost Souls

1933

Dr Moreau: What is the law? Sayer of the Law: Not to eat meat, that is the law. Are we not men? Beasts (in unison) : Are we not men? Dr Moreau: What is the law? Sayer of the Law: Not to go on all fours, that is the law. Are we not men? Beasts (in unison) : Are we not men? Dr Moreau: What is the law? Sayer of the Law: Not to spill blood, that is the law. Are we not men? Beasts (in unison) : Are we not men?

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Island of Terror

1966

Dr Brian Stanley: What the devil did Napoleon do on that island to keep himself busy? Dr David West: He invented solitaire. Toni Merrill: I've a much better game in mind. Dr Brian Stanley: Can three play?

Constable John Harris: You know that I'm not a man who's easily shaken, Dr Landers. But by all that's holy, I've just seen somethin' I can't be sure about. I - I think it's Ian Bellows. Dr Reginald Landers: You think it's Ian? Well, what's happened to him? Constable John Harris: I don't know. His body's all like - like jelly. Dr Reginald Landers: Jelly? Constable John Harris: Aye. There was no face. Just a horrible mush with the eyes sittin' in it.

Morton: John, I've just found one of my horses dead. At least, I think it's my horse. It's all soft and flabby.

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It Couldn't Happen Here

1987

Radio Newsreader: The stranger has been known to masquerade as a priest wearing high heeled shoes.

Priest: I smell youth... vintage youth. Neil Tennant: You don't have any weapons in there, do you? Priest: Why? What do you need?

Chris Lowe: Where are you from? Neil Tennant: Yes where are you from? Priest: I'm glad you asked me twice. You see I'm a bilingual. A bilingual illiterate - I can't read in two languages.

Priest: I'm just tired... I've been up all night trying to round off the infinate. And Lucifer before the day doth go. Chris Lowe: Don't we know you? Priest: I don't know. I used to be blind. But then I started eating carrots. I still can't see during the day.

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It Had to Be You

2000/I

(Henry and Charlie in the hotel bar. Henry sees Anna, Charlie looks and catches her eye. She waves, he smiles) Henry: What's that about? Charlie: Oh, we took the elevator up together... Henry: That's it? That's the big juice? Charlie: What do you want me to say? Okay... She's a spy and we're both planning on making love before we're assassinated by the CIA.

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It Happened at the World's Fair

1963

Danny Burke: You didn't tell me she was put together like that! Mike Edwards: Can't you tell a nice girl when you meet one? Danny Burke: Oh oh! Now he's a cub scout. What happened, somebody steal your wolf whistle?

Mike Edwards: Hey kid, how would you like to kick me in the shin? Boy: How would I like to kick you in the shin? Mike Edwards: Uhum. Boy: Mister are you drunk? Mike Edwards: No. I'll tell you what, if you kick me in the shin I'll give you a quarter, here. (Gives the boy a quarter and the boy kicks him.) Mike Edwards: (in pain) Yeoww! That's good! Thanks kid. (limps off) Boy: (shaking his head) Adults, there're all nuts!

Sue Lin: Ohhhh! Ohhhh! I don't feel good, Mr Mike. I don't feel good! Mike Edwards: I wonder why!

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It's in the Water

1997

Spencer: I guess I first realized I was gay when I put together some fabulous throw pillows that matched the curtains in the breakfast nook of my tree house.

Jack Talbot: Our antiques are new.

Viola: The water's unsafe to be drinkin'!

Mark: Hi, my name's Mark, and I'm a... Group: Healthy Heterosexual Male!

Protestors: No hope for Homos!

Grace Miller: (seeing Sloane) Nice tits.

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It's Now... or NEVER!

1995

E.: It's too late, Red. He's already dead. Red: He's still movin'. E.: Spasms, Red.

E.: Assuing bipolar, eliptical orbits, these alien creatures can only receive satellite transmissions from Channel 7 Eyewitness News, and old gangster films on American Movie Classics Network---thus assuming our culture, as well as our own three-dimensional reality are the same as these shows.

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It's Punky Brewster

1985

Theme Song: I went to the end where the rainbows are. There wasn't any pot of gold. Instead I found a new friend who is three feet tall... But when the rainbow faded, he was left behind. And a lot like Punky, he is one-of-a-kind. Punky Brewster, I always want you here with me-e. Uh-oh, uh-oh. Punky Brewster, together we're a fantasy. Uh-oh, uh-oh. Punky Brewster, we'll always be the best of frie-ends. Punky Brewster, you know our friendship will never e-end. Uh, oh. Uh, oh.

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It's the Pied Piper, Charlie Brown

2000 (TV)

Sally: What are you watching, big brother? Charlie Brown: I am watching a program that's supposed to make you a better person. Sally: It's not working, is it?

Interviewer: Come on, Mayor, what are ya gonna do about all these mice? Say something stupid and we'll put it on the network tonight!

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Jack Frost

1998/II

(After seeing a corpse dressed up like a Christmas tree.) Deputy Chris: Do you think we should wait until after the holidays to take her down?

Sally: She's only talking back to you because she's upset. Jake: Sally, when I want philosophy, I'll turn on "Oprah."

Tommy: What the heck are you? Jack Frost: The world's most pissed-off snow cone!

Jack Frost: Gosh. I only axed you for a smoke.

Jack Frost: Don't eat yellow snow!

Jack Frost: Well it aint f*cking frosty!

(Jack's head flying through the air) Jack Frost: I can see your house from up here!

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Jack-Jack Attack

2005 (V)

(doorbell rings. Kari rushes to door, exhausted) Syndrome: Is this the Parr residence? Kari: Yes! I'm Kari - the babysitter! Syndrome: Well, hello - Kari. Kari: You're my replacement, thank heavens you've come! What's the "S" stand for? Syndrome: It stands for... sitter! Yeah, sitter. I was originally going to have the initials for babysitter but then I'd be going around with a big BS and you can understand why I couldn't do that.

Kari: The baby was exploding! Have you ever seen an exploding baby before, Mr Dicker?

Kari: (to herself) Don't panic! Baby on fire, baby on fire!

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Jam

2000

Chris Morris: When dancing, lost in techo trance, arms flailing, gawky Bez, then find you snagged on frowns, and slowly it dawns, you're jazzing to the bleep tone of a life support machine that marks the steady fading of your day old baby daughter. And when midnight sirens lead to blue flash road mash, stretchers, covered heads and slippy red macadam, and find you creeping 'neath the blankets, to snuggle close a mangle bird, hoping you soon too will be freezer drawed. Then welcome. Mmm, ooh chemotherapy wig. Welcome. In Jam, Jam, Jam, Jam, Jaaaaam.

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James Dean

1976 (TV)

(opening narration) Narrator: His name was James Byron Dean. He was an actor. He died in 1955 at the age of 24. He had starred in just three pictures, only one of which had been released prior to his death. Yet before he was in his grave he was already a myth. What you are about to see is one man's recollection - an image of the actor as seen through the eyes of a friend. Like all memories in is intensely personal, elusive and incomplete - yet it refuses to die.

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Janghwa, Hongryeon

2003

Eun-ju: Do know what's really scary? You want to forget something. Totally wipe it off your mind. But you never can. It can't go away, you see. And... and it follows you around like a ghost.

Eun-ju: As much as you hate it, I'm the only one in this world you can call mother, got it?

Eun-ju: There's something strange in this house.

Mi-hee: There was a girl under the kitchen sink.

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January Man

1989

Frank Starkey: I wish you would fuckin' die.

(Nick is struggling with the killer) Nick Starkey: Listen, stop kicking me. I hate that. (The killer kicks him again) Nick Starkey: I told you to stop that! You're not gettin' away, why don't you just fuckin' accept it?

(after Nick has broken down an apartment door) Woman: Where's my door? Bernadette: On the floor.

Nick: Ed, I think it'd be best if you don't come in the apartment. Ed: You got it. I'm an artist. I'll watch the woman.

Ed: In reference to Susan Sarandon's character Christine Starkey: The world is either great or wretched, isn't it? So many people are just... finished. Bernadette: Y'think, huh?

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Jaws 3-D

1983

Kathryn Morgan: Overman was killed inside the park. The baby was caught inside the park. It's mother is inside the park.

Mike Brody: I don't believe it. She got him in the water. Kathryn Morgan: Never underestimate the power.

Charlene Tutt: He don't sleep in, he don't live in! You tell Shelby Overman for me he can take a flying leap in a rolling doughnut on a gravel driveway!

Calvin Bouchard: You mean we talkin' about some damn shark's mutha?

Kathryn Morgan: He needs eyes in the back of his head, Calvin.

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Jeepers Creepers II

2003

(Taggert is looking for the disabled bus) Taggert: Are there any landmarks nearby? What are you close to? Buck: I'm close to pissing my fuckin' pants!

Coach Dwayne Barnes: What happened? What did you see? Jake: What'd you see? Coach Dwayne Barnes: Come on! Did you see something or not? Jake: She flew away.

(voice is rewinding) Darry Jenner: Every 23rd spring, for 23 days it gets to eat. Minxie Hayes: Eat what? Darry Jenner: Eat us.

Buck: Two groups? What, the "will be eaten" and the "won't be eaten"?

Dante Belasco: Maybe it only opens from the outside. Jake: It's an Emergency Exit, idiot! Dante Belasco: Well then you fucking open it!

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Jerry's Cousin

1950

(Cousin Muscles grabs Tom and eyes him closely) Cousin Muscles: Listen, pussycat! Don't let me catch ya pickin' on my little cousin while I'm around. Y'understand? Now BEAT IT! (Muscles throws Tom into a vase)

(Cousin Muscles is reading Jerry's telegram) Cousin Muscles: Dear Cousin Muscles. Am having serious trouble with Tom. Need your help at once. Jerry.

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Jesus

1999 (TV)

Mary Magdalene: I just don't understand how you can believe in someone like me. Jesus: God forgives you Mary Mary Magdalene: If I were a man I'd be your most loyal disciple. Jesus: Those who speak for me *are* my disciples

Mary Magdalene: Were you a good carpenter? Jesus: It's a good thing I started preaching.

Jesus: Martha, you've embarrassed Mary. Martha: And you've enchanted her.

Martha: Mary, stop smiling at Jesus.

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Jeux d'enfants

2003

Sophie Kowalski: Tell me that you love me first because I'm afraid that if I tell you first you'll think that I'm playing the game.

Julien Jeanvier: You know... there were lots of things I was game for that you never said. Sophie Kowalski: Like? Julien Jeanvier: Eating ants... insulting the unemployed... loving you like crazy. (they kiss)

Julien Jeanvier: Being an adult means to have a speedometer that marks 210 and not driving over 60.

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Jimmy Hollywood

1994

William: You know what I could never figure out about the Mummy? The Mummy used to walk with one arm out and a leg draggin' behind him, but he was still always able get his victim. I'm thinkin' as a kid, I was pretty fast, I'd just, ya know, put some moves on the Mummy and the Mummy, he'd never get me. Jimmy: This is what you're thinkin' about? William: Then I realized, the Mummy never has to sleep. Eventually, I'd get tired of runnin' around the Mummy. That's when he'd get me.

Harrison Ford: Is this a principal role? I mean, 'cause, I came here for a principal role! They said it was a principal role. Woman: Well, this is what we're casting today. Harrison Ford: This is two lines. I'm not doin' two lines. I didn't come here for two lines. I was told this was a principal role!

Jimmy: What are ya gonna do? Kill me? Then everybody dies.

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Joe

1970

Joe: Forty-two percent of all liberals are queer, that's a fact. The Wallace people did a poll.

Joe: The niggers, the niggers are gettin' all da money. Why work, tell me, why the fuck work, when you can screw, have babies, an' get paid for it?

Melissa Compton: Are you gonna kill me too?

Bill Compton: (asked if he has any spare change) No, but I've got a spare job.

Bill Compton: (asked if he wants to buy marijuana) I got all I need sonny boy.

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John F. Kennedy: Years of Lightning, Day of Drums

1966

Offscreen Narrator: But the word that very few spoke, and the word with perhaps the greatest truth, was the word "prejudice". And most of the United States knew there was prejudice and wanted it to end. But even as the signs came down, the prejudice did not end.

Offscreen Narrator: And it was true the President was killed. But it was also true that the assassin missed his target, for he wanted John Kennedy to die, and that he was unable to do. For no man can take away years of lightning with a single day of drums.

Offscreen Narrator: (about November 22, 1963) The morning came, but the sun would set at midday.

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John Johnson's Shadowhunters

2004

Goose: Let's go find some scattered ass.

Murphy: Hudson, we found another corpse on the second floor. Looks like another unfortunate vagrant. Hudson: Yeah, well, we got a boozed-up pants-shitter in a Hallowe'en mask running around. So we're even. Murphy: This is insane.

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John Mayer Has a TV Show

2004 (TV)

Host: Backstage after my performance at the Viper room. In walks, 16 of the hottest groupies that I have ever seen before, wearin' nothing but kimonos and body glitter. I mean were doin' zippers and zoomers, jalepeno poppers you name it. Suddenly one of the twins stars yelling at me, "Oh my God, your eyes are bleeding." So they rush me to the hospital, where I was legally dead for 17 minutes. Finally they shock me back to life, I say, "Thanks, doc, I've got a few ladies to entertain... " So eleven orgasms later, two and a half of them mine, the next thing I know I'm on fire, running through the Chteau Marmont. It didn't, happen, but man, that would have been a wild night.

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Johnny Got His Gun

1971

Father: He eats through a tube. And whatever comes in through a tube has to go out through a tube. He is the armless, legless wonder of the twentieth century. And yet, by God, he's just as alive as you and me.

Joe: Inside me I'm screaming, nobody pays any attention. If I had arms, I could kill myself. If I had legs, I could run away. If I had a voice, I could talk and be some kind of company for myself. I could yell for help, but nobody would help me.

Joe: I don't know whether I'm alive and dreaming or dead and remembering.

Joe: When it comes my turn, will you want me to go? Father: For democracy, any man would give his only begotten son.

Joe: There's a game out there, and the stakes are high. And the guy who runs it figures the averages all day long and all night long. Once in a while he lets you steal a pot. But if you stay in the game long enough, you've got to lose. And once you've lost there's no way back, no way at all.

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Johnny O'Clock

1947

Chuck Blayden: You get in my way and I'll kill you. Johnny O'Clock: You took the words right out of my mouth.

Nancy Hobbs: If it's just for laughs, then I want to be in on the joke from the start.

Inspector Koch: You know, any evidence obtained through 'third degree' methods is inadmissable in court. Johnny O'Clock: I'm relieved you know how to read.

Nancy Hobbs: What do I do now, Johnny? Johnny O'Clock: Dry your eys and blow your nose in the order named.

Pete Marchettis: You're whistling through your teeth. Johnny O'Clock: So let him whistle.

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Joint Account

1989

David Braithwaite: (hanging his coat by the door) I really don't understand how you can do things like that! Belinda Braithwaite: Like what? David Braithwaite: You told the vicar there was no god! (Audience laughs) Belinda Braithwaite: A theological discussion! David Braithwaite: And he said there was, and you said if that was the case, presumably he could help keep his ministers from harm, and he said there was certainly that possibility. Belinda Braithwaite: All seems pretty harmless so far. David Braithwaite: Then you stamped on his foot, and said "Where was god that time, buster?" (Audience laughs)

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Journal d'un cur de campagne

1951

Cur de Torcy: Make order. Make order all day long. Make order while thinking that disorder will take over the following day, because it is precisely within order, unfortunately, that the night will blow away yesterday's work.

Cur d'Ambricourt: Our hidden sins poison the air that others breathe.

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Journeyman Project 2: Buried in Time

1995 (VG)

Arthur: Gage, I don't mean to say that you have an ego problem, but... you have an action figure of yourself.

Arthur: Get... off... my... station! GET OFF MY STATION! Hmm... that always seemed to work on 'Scooby-Do'.

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Jbei ninpch

1993

Jubei: Burn in your golden HELL.

Tesai: Not quite the right direction. The road to Hell is... RIGHT HERE.

Jubei: Gemma, where are you hiding? When I die, I'll take you to Hell with me.

Jubei: If you so want the company of devils, you'd better hurry back to hell, Gemma.

Dakuan: Aha! So you beat me. I thought I would stop your mouth in Edo, but I don't think I'd get the chance, seeing as how you so love risking your life. Everything ends exactly as I have written it.

Dakuan: To understand people's minds and control them is the secret of the ninja strategy. But only true sympathy can move the human heart. A pompous old ninja like me can't hope to do it.

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Judge Roy Bean

1956

(a railroad man has insulted the portrait of Lily Langtry) Judge Roy Bean: Who are you to call that lady chunky, you low-down, moth-eathen tenderfoot! Get out of my store you saddlebums! Never show your faces in Langtry, Texas again, or I'll throw you in jail for insulting the fairest woman west of the Atlantic!

Judge Roy Bean: This here court is now in session, Judge Roy Bean presiding, handin' out the law west of the Pecos.

(Judge Bean has found a railroad man guilty of shooting cattle) Judge Roy Bean: You better teach your boys the difference between deers and steers.

(last lines of each episode) Judge Roy Bean: Court's adjourned.

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Jui kuen II

1994

Wong Kei-ying: Water floats, but also capsizes boats.

Wong Fei-hong: Drinking gives Herculean strength!

Wong Fei-hung: (Drinking some very strong alcohol in the middle of a fight) What the hell is that? Mrs Wong: What does it mean when there's a picture of a skull? Wong Fei-hung: Good stuff!!!

Senior in restaurant #1: If you have job, you wear the pants!

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Julia

1968

Dr Chegley: You were late again this morning. Why? Don't tell me your car broke down. Julia Baker: My car broke down. Dr Chegley: I told you not to tell me that.

Julia Baker: The last time I went on a blind date, I got stuck with the check. Marie Waggedorn: Well the last time I went out on one, I got stuck with a husband.

Julia Baker: It's made up of odds and ends, and it's odd where it ends.

Corey: Gee, you're big. Are you a football player? Jordan Hayes: No, I'm an actor. Corey: That's too bad.

Dr Chegley: Mr Potts, when I was a small boy I had a rusty little tin soldier I lost in the sands of Tiny Island. I started to cry, but my father told me to cheer up because the rusty little tin soldier would come back someday and Papa was right.

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Julian Po

1997

Julian Po: I'm not going to kill myself today, so you can all just go on home.

Potter: A man in your position should have two suits.

Sarah: I had a dream about you... That's why I'm here. I dreamed... I dreamed that I saw you in a field and the field became my bedroom and you were standing by my bed holding a big knife and suddenly you stabbed yourself with it and I woke up and I knew you were the man I'd been waiting for my whole life.

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Junebug

2005

Ashley: God loves you just the way you are. But He loves you too much to let you stay that way.

Madeleine: I was born in Japan. Ashley: You were not!

Madeleine: I even bite my toenails. Ashley: You do not!

Peg: I don't want your water breaking. We just had the upholstery cleaned.

Eugene: I have done some screwing in here I guess.

Madeleine: Did they sign a contract? Bernadette: It wasn't clear; all I know is they were obviously influenced by someone's, you know, high-falutin' talkin'.

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Jung-Gwok chiu-yan

1975

Princess Dragon Mom: Greetings to you, Earthlings, I am Princess Dragon Mom. I have taken over this planet, now I own the Earth and you'll be my slaves for all eternity.

Professor: There are other weapons I haven't given you as yet. For success it's essential you have thunderball fists. Rayma: I can have such a thing? Professor: That's right, thunderball fists!

Professor: No matter how potent your weapons are, you'll be defeated because Infra-Man is invincible against them!

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Jungle Woman

1944/I

(first lines) Coroner: Dr Fletcher, as long as you have elected to take the stand at this inquest, I again urge you to give us more information regarding the circumstances surrounding the death of the deceased. You are being of no help to us by your continued silence.

(last lines) District Attorney: My apologies, Dr Fletcher. Dr Fletcher: Thank you. Thank you, sir.

(last title card) Title Card: "The evil that man hath wrought shall in the end destroy itself"...

Willie: Aw, it's a gyp!

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Just Another Romantic Wrestling Comedy

2005

Robert John: I'll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle

Roxanne: I'm so full from olive... ahhh...

Booger boy: It's all in the dig and the twist!

Young Marty Shalom Weinstein: A wrestler is the man of your dreams? Young Sandy: Yeah.

Young John Bond: Does Monster know you're here? Young Marty Shalom Weinstein: No, this is a free country.

Rocco Piedra: Marky Einstein? Rocco Piedra: The little guy? Rocco Piedra: He's not even a wrestler! Rocco Piedra: Isn't he gay? Sandy Gold Piedra: No daddy. Sandy Gold Piedra: He's not gay, he's Jewish.

Robert John: Ok, ok calm your dot! Dr Sven Leven: Thank you, you crazy animal! Hurray!

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Just Imagine

1930

Single O: Boys, I vouldn't know de old town! Vere is all de automobiles? RT-42: (pointing skyward) Oh, they're in the upper level. J-21: Hardly anyone drives a car now. They all use planes. Single O: Is dat so? RT-42: Yeah, I drive a Rosenblatt. J flies a Pinkus for his personal use, but all the airliners are Goldfarbs. Single O: Goldfarb! (laughs uproariously) It looks like someone got even with Henry Ford!

Single O: (upon meeting Looloo, then Loko) She's not the queen - *he* is!

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Just Looking

1995

(Mary is watching one of Jim's porn videos) Jim: What're you doing? Mary: Research. Jim: Oh, Mary... Mary: Is this how you want me to be? Jim: Mary, I don't want you to be like those women Mary: I will if that's what you want. I'll just have to get my tits enlarged and drop my IQ a few levels.

Sheri: You see, this is the beauty of short term relationships. You can have all your whips and chains and never have to deal with the tampon trips to the 7-Eleven.

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Just Looking

1999

Polinsky: Has anyone ever told you about the birds and the bees? Lenny: (sarcastically) Yeah, we learned about it in biology. bees sting and birds crap on your head.

Barbara: In the "sex club" we only talk about sex, we don't actual do it. Lenny: That's okay I would not want to get anyone pregnant. Alice: Oh you don't have to worry about that Barbara can't get pregnant, she has not started her period yet. Barbara: Hey. Lenny: What?

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Just Say Julie

1989

(Part of the opening theme jingle) She the cutest little henna head on MTV/Just say Julie!/Wa wa wa wa wa!

(Julie is at the premiere of "Earth Girls Are Easy") Charlie: (holding an Oscar) Geena Davis left her Oscar in the limo. Julie: I'll give it back to her. (She takes it. As Charlie walks away, Julie turns to the camera.) Julie: It's MINE now!

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Just You and Me, Kid

1979

Doctor Device: (after hiding Kate on the ceiling with a levitation trick) Now, we'll let you down, if you promise never to tell how we do this. Kate: OK. But, how do you do it?

Police officer: Sorry we bothered you, sir. Bill: That's alright, officer. You did what you had to do even though I told you you didn't have to do it. G'bye girls.

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Kabzaa

1988

Ravi Varma, Rita: Dil ki adalat pyar ka mukadama, dekho vakil babu ban gaye balma... In the High Court of the heart, in the Court proceedings of love, the lawyer has become a sweetheart...

Ustad Ali Mohammed: Eh mere dil har dum ye dua kar, ya mere malik tu sabka bala kar... My heart also wishes well, O my God please help everyone...

Ravi Varma, Rita: Tumse miley bin chain nahin aahta main kya karun, mujhey to ye bhi kahena bhi nahin aahta main kya karun... I am restless without meeting you, what to do, I don't even know how to say this, what to do...

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Kaij daisenso

1965

Tetsuo: You? Well this is a funny place to meet. Yah, I'm gonna die laughing.

Astronaut K. Fuji: (about King Ghidorah) Can't you drive it away? Controller of Planet X: If you have an idea how to do it, won't you tell us?

Controller of Planet X: (about the victory over King Ghidorah, while Godzilla is outside dancing) A happy moment.

Glenn: Mutual trust is a beautiful thing Haruno Fuji: That won't buy groceries.

Glenn: You should have left your sister packed in ice.

Tetsuo: (both Glenn and Tetsuo pop up out of the water) Well, what are we going to do now? Glenn: Well, we sure ain't gonna wait for the next ferry. Swim!

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Kakushi toride no san akunin

1958

(first lines) Tahei: Get away from me! You stink of dead bodies!

General Rokurota Makabe: Hide a stone among stones and a man among men.

(last lines) Tahei: (Tahei hands Matakishi a piece of gold) You take this. Matakishi: No, you keep it. Tahei: But... Matakishi: Don't worry about it. (they both laugh)

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Kama Sutra: A Tale of Love

1996

Tara: If you are not properly attired, you will not exhilarate my husband. Maya: Exhilaration is my department.

King: You must hate me. Tara: I don't love you enough to hate you.

The King: One day you are your father's property. One day you are your husband's property. It must be difficult.

Teacher of the Kama Sutra: Some things don't make sense immediately.

Maya: Knowing love, I can allow all things to come and go, to be as supple as the wind and to face all things with great courage.My heart is a open as the sky

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Kansas City Confidential

1952

Tim Foster: That was a sucker move, burning down your boss. You had him all wrong. He never crossed you.

Tim Foster: What makes a two-bit heel like you think a heater would give him an edge over me?

Pete Harris: Okay wise guy, you found me. Now what? Joe Rolfe: What's eatin' you? Pete Harris: You been giving me the fisheye all night.

Tim Foster: What's waiting for you, Harris? The chair, the gas chamber, or just a rope?

Tony Romano: It don't take no big thinking to figure a couple of guys like us ain't in this bananaville on a vacation!

Joe Rolfe: Look, you're a nice girl, but in case you're thinking of mothering me, forget it! I'm no stray dog you can pick up, and I like my neck without a collar. Now get lost! Helen Foster: Now I'm supposed to be hurt. Maybe even cry. But I won't. I think you're in trouble, and I'm going to help you.

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Karakter

1997

De Gankelaar: Who taught you that senseless self-chastisement? I give you the money and you take it! People who can't accept a gift have nothing to give themselves.

Jacob Katadreuffe: Today I have been made a lawyer. You no longer exist for me! You have worked against me all my life! Dreverhaven: Or for you.

Joba: Why don't you leave our boy in peace? Dreverhaven: I'll strangle him for nine-tenths, and the last tenth will make him strong.

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Kazaam

1996

Kazaam: Grab my belly and make a wish.

Nick Connor: You get no second chances in life, no second chances.

Max Connor: You smell like hippopotamus butt.

Alice Connor: That's right, it's poisoned. I figured if I ended your suffering, mine would end too.

Kazaam: I am... Kazaam!

Kazaam: Is that a wish?

Kazaam: That's not a wish, that's an insult!

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Kaze no tani no Naushika

1984

Commando: That's Lord Yupa. Kill him and you'll be famous.

Yupa: In the midst of my travels, I heard of an ominous rumor... It said that a monster from the ancient world had been excavated from beneath the city of Pejite where it had been sleeping. Mito: A monster from the ancient world? Yupa: It's a God Warrior. Mito: A God Warrior? You mean, the ones that burned the world in the Seven Days of Fire... ? This thing ... ! Yupa: All God Warriors should have become fossils. But this one managed to sleep underground for 1000 years. Mito: Now that you mention it, it does seem to have a human form.

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