top

So This Is Paris

1926/II

Dr Paul Giraud: It takes a man of my genius to go to jail dressed like this.

Maurice Lalle: You're too heavy for an artist like me. Georgette Lalle: No other man ever complained about my weight - and some of them were pretty weak!

Dr Paul Giraud: You insulted me first. Police Officer: I've a right to insult you - I'm an officer.

Dr Paul Giraud: I am amused to meet you.

Dr Paul Giraud: After seeing how wonderful you looked at the window- I came over to tell you how wonderful you looked at the window.

top

So, What's In Jericho?

(1999)

Jes: Frank, we don't even know this guy's name. The Hitcher: My name is Legion, for we are many.

Frank: I don't make mistakes, Jes. I have "happy accidents."

Frank: You know I always land on my feet. Jes: It's where your feet land that worries me.

The Hitcher: Did you know that the saucer crash in Roswell, New Mexico was not from a hostile alien invasion? It was an intergalactic exchange program. The aliens were teaching humans how to make and fly their own UFOs, so they could escape the fate of this world. That's why it crashed. It was an American made saucer. I base this theory on the fact that an eyewitness overheard one of the aliens say, "From here on out we deal with the Japanese." Of course he said it telepathically.

top

Something for Everyone

1970

Lotte Von Ornstein: The dogs approve of you. They only approve of murderers and perverts. Which one are you? Konrad Ludwig: Both! Lotte Von Ornstein: I knew it.

Princess Palamir: What a lovely party, countess. One hopes you are not over-extending yourself. Countess Herthe von Ornstein: (walking away) Silly old bitch!

Countess Herthe von Ornstein: I don't like to be left behind. I have no talent for it.

Countess Herthe von Ornstein: There are no more real men. Facsimiles, that's all. Facsimiles!

top

Something Wicked This Way Comes

1983

Charles Halloway: (quoting Shakespeare) By the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes.

Mr Dark: Then rang the bells both loud and deep. God is not dead nor doth he sleep.

Tom Fury: Some folks draw lightning to them as a cat to baby's breath!

Charles Halloway: (to Mr Dark) Where do you come from? The dust. Where do you go to? The grave.

Charles Halloway: I, uh, have the honor, sir. Mr Dark: And have had for many years, I do believe. All those years living only other men's lives. Dreaming only other men's dreams. What a waste. Charles Halloway: Sometimes a man can learn more form other men's dreams than he can from his own. Come visit me, sir, if you wish to improve your education. Mr Dark: I will, and I may improve yours.

top

Son of the Border

1933

Doris: What makes you think Tom took the stage? Tupper: Well, I sold him a one-way ticket to Phoenix. Doris: Only one? Tupper: He's not so important that he takes two tickets to haul him.

Tom Owens: Say, why don't you try gettin' up in the morning? Frankie Breen: Well, how do I know it's morning until I wake up?

top

Sonatine

1993

Ken: Not fair! You are using a real gun!

(shooting at a Frisbee) Aniki Murakawa: There's no way you can hit it! I'm not Buffalo Bill, arsehole!

Maeda: Fancy something to drink? Bald Yakuza: No. My stomach still hurts from when you stabbed me.

Aniki Murakawa: Indecent exposure is fun.

Miyuki: You're tough. I love tough guys. Aniki Murakawa: I wouldn't carry a gun if I were tough. Miyuki: You can shoot without a second thought. Aniki Murakawa: I shoot fast because I get scared fast. Miyuki: But you're not afraid of dying, are you? Aniki Murakawa: When you're scared all the time, you reach a point when you wish you were dead.

top

Song of the Gringo

1936

Evans: Lolita, the Don's daughter, is of special interest to me. Is that clear? Tex: Well I-I gather you mean, uh, you don't want no one to cut your fences. Evans: You are very, very, comprehensive.

Cherokee: You know, boys, it would be right peaceful here if this whinin' and playin' suddenly stopped. Tex: (continues to strum his guitar) That reminds me of an hombre I once knew... always braggin' about how tough he was, and how fast he was on the draw. He and I had a crush on the same girl. 'Course it was no contest... my singin' and good looks cinched it. She fell for me. The showdown came when I was singin' a song he didn't like. I told him to go for his gun. Now considerin' everything, he was powerful fast... but not fast enough. And you know boys, I only missed two notes a-gettin' him... but I picked them up before he hit the floor.

top

Songcatcher

2000

Viney Butler: Alice, you're gonna have to keep Reese away from you. Well, if you don't want butter, you go to pull the dasher out in time.

Lily Penleric: Are you drunk? Tom Bledsoe: I'm not drunk, I'm... celebrating.

Tom Bledsoe: See, that's what you outlanders don't understand. Life is for enjoying, not just getting and working, and getting and working.

top

Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama

1988

The Imp: Old Uncle Impy is just a little bit cranky. No fun being locked up, especially in a bowling trophy.

Spider: It's too bad we had to kill her. I really liked the outfit she had on.

Spider: What is this, Midnight Wimp Bowling League? Taffy: Who are you? The Bride of Dracula? Spider: Oooo. Jump back. Prom queen on the loose. Or is it high school hookers?

Uncle Impy: Such a sour face. Spider: Stuff it, you little prick. Uncle Impy: Uncle Impy will ignore that remark but he'll remember it.

top

Sorority House Massacre II

1990

Linda: I know you're out there - you really hurt me -please, if you've got an ounce of humanity left, you've gotta remember!

Janey: We're gonna turn this into the best sorority house in school!

Janey: I never really told you guys why we got the place so cheap.

Guy in plaid shirt: I found em - I found em all!

Guy in plaid shirt: If you be needing anything, I'll be watching.

Lt Block: Body parts were scattered all over the house!

Lt Block: Jeez, not again!

Suzanne: No one puts a finger on my diviner.

Jessica: All right, let's spread out - we'll find her.

Jessica: I'll be right back - stay alert!

Candy: We did see him that afternoon lurking around the neighborhood.

top

Soul Mates

2004

Ozzie: What? I'm real with my feelings. What? Bruce: You convinced a quadriplegic to go surfing. Ozzie: Saltwater is good for the bones.

Ozzie: I'm being sexually propositioned by the devil? Maxi: I wish! That would be the afterlife, huh. (snickers) Nope, I'm just a broker.

Ozzie: Church is for old folks and ugly women.

Ozzie: Listen up, playas! This is your man Ozzie Greer, get your answers here, boyyy! Hit me up. You know that stuff. And ladies, no fatties... not unless you're shaking that nasty...

top

Soul Plane

2004

Captain Mack: This is your soul plane chauffeur Captain Antoine Mack speaking. Welcome aboard NWA flight 069 from the 310 to the 212. It's time to bust this coney y'all. In a hot second, I'll be hittin' them switches and gettin' this bitch pumpin' and jumpin'. So screw your sh*t on tight and enjoy the flight.

Captain Mack: Testicles, 1, 2... Testicles, 1, 2.

Flame: (calmly, after a stewardess has whispered something into his ear) I'll handle this. Flame: (screams) THE CAPTAIN'S DEAD!

Blanca: (after catching Method Man staring at her chest) Ain't no drink down there. Muggsy: The hell there ain't.

top

Sound Test for Blackmail

1929

Alfred Hitchcock: Now, uh, Miss Ondra. You asked me to let you hear your voice on the talking picture. Anny Ondra: Ha, ha. But, Hitch, you mustn't do that. Alfred Hitchcock: Why not? Anny Ondra: Well, because . . . I can't speak well. Alfred Hitchcock: Do you realise the squad van will be here any moment? Anny Ondra: No, really? Oh, my god. I'm terribly frightened. Alfred Hitchcock: Why? Have you been a bad woman or something? Anny Ondra: Well, not just bad, but . . . uh. Alfred Hitchcock: But you've slept with men. Anny Ondra: Oh, no! Alfred Hitchcock: You have not? Come here. Stand in your place, otherwise it will not come out right, as the girl said to the soldier. Alfred Hitchcock: That's enough.

top

South Park

1998 (VG)

Stan Marsh: Okay, it's my turn to kick their asses!

Kyle Broflovski: Die, Pecker-Head!

Kyle Broflovski: Outta the way, Dummy, I'm kickin' some ass!

Phillip: I fart on your Grave!

Stan Marsh: (at the multiplayer win screen) Ha ha ha. You all suck ass!

Eric Cartman: Ow! That Hurt, you butt licker!

Big Gay Al: You're asking for a Drive-by slapping!

Jimbo: Hey, You made me spill my beer!

top

South Sea Woman

1953

Master Gunnery Sgt. James O'Hearn: You two are not married. The ceremony Woo Ching read for you was the burial ceremony. Ginger Martin: What? Master Gunnery Sgt. James O'Hearn: That's Chinese burial service, that's why you are wearing white clothes.

Master Gunnery Sgt. James O'Hearn: I'm going to the beach and get a canoe. Lillie Duval: Monsieur... without your pants?

top

Southern Redemption Part 1: From Midnight to Morning, Baby

2004

Fig-Evil: Hummingbirds don't live too long 'round here.

Mista Live-D: Sweet bird that shun the noise of folly, most musical, most melancholy. Fig-Evil: Say what? Mista Live-D: A man named Milton said that. You don't strike me as the type of cat that would dig Milton. Fig-Evil: Never heard of the mother fucker.

Young C.W.: You ever met the devil? Doc Reed: Oh yes, many times. He's offered me many things, rich things. But all the money and success in the world can't buy you back your legacy.

top

Space Freaks from Planet Mutoid

1995

Outer-space sex goddess: In this room I feel the echo of a thousand dreams.

(to his goons) Gangster: Make it painful, and get me a souvenir.

Rock singer: Love feels like a hard right cross to your stomach when you're not expecting it.

Rock singer: I'm gonna sing to you, 'cause my heart is true.

top

Space Ghost

1966

Space Ghost: I shall never rest until I bring him to justice.

Pyranor: 'Diabolical' is a mild word for the fate in store for you.

Pyranor: Revenge is sweet, Space Ghost.

Space Ghost: Pyranor himself said, 'Revenge is sweet,' except when it backfires.

Cyclo: Cyclo to all Cyclo Sentinels... Initiate herding action into my Maze of Horror.

Space Ghost: Great Galaxy. What are those weird things?

Space Ghost: So you were watching on your screen, huh? I'm going to have to cut off mutual scanning.

top

Space Quest II: Vohaul's Revenge

1987 (VG)

Sludge Vohaul: I intend to infest your planet with genetically-engineered, door-to-door insurance salesmen.

Narrator: The guard appears to be less thick than you remember him. Many of his formerly contained body fluids seem to be at large.

Narrator: Didn't you learn anything in the last game? You can't expose bare human to the harshness of space!

Narrator: Life sucks... again.

top

Spank

2003

Chavez: Baby? I want to have babies with you. Ashlin: What, right now?

Chavez: I hope he was worth it. Ashlin: He just kissed me. It didn't mean anything!

Chavez: (voiceover) I knew what I was supposed to do next. I was supposed to beat the living shit out of her, and then fuck her good. She liked that.

Brian: Hi sexy... I'm back!

Amber: I think what you need... is a good spanking!

top

Sparkler

1997

Melba: I'm looking for an old friend of mine. Old Lady: What's her name? Melba: Dottie Delgato. Old Lady: Dottie? Well, they all seemed to be named Dottie these days. Dottie, Tammy, Crystal, Vanna - Oh, that's a big one now! Did she have a stage name? Melba: At the Tropicana I believe they called her Lady Luck. Old Lady: Lady Luck? That's original. Did, uh, did she play with feathers? Melba: I don't think so. Old Lady: Appliances? Melba: Not to my knowledge. I do believe she did things with a baton. Old Lady: Oh! Oh, yeah, yeah! Lady Luck, loves to fuck!

(Melba's answering machine) Melba: Hello! It's a beautiful day! There's gonna be a beep, and you talk to it. Okay? And... okay!

top

Speaking of Sex

2001

Jennifer Klink: All of a sudden, he is Mr Oral Sex. Up until then Roger had *very* rarely, uh, 'cunnilinged' me. Felix: Can you say, uh, 'cunnilinged'? Jennifer Klink: (laughs) Well, I don't know. What's the verb for cunnilingus? Felix: 'Cunniligated'? Jennifer Klink: (laughs amd hits him on the arm flirtatiously) stop it! Felix: Cunnilingual? Is that a verb? Jennifer Klink: (still laughing) I don't know, but I like it!

top

Special Bulletin

1983 (TV)

John Woodley: Is it possible to compare the weapons deployed today, the kind of the Russians may have aimed at Charleston with what the terrorists have on that ship? Arlen Surrey: John, tonight, people who are 5 miles from the harbor would survive the blast at least. If a Soviet 1 megaton bomb was dropped on the harbor, those people, 5 miles away, would be vaporized in the first three-fifths of a second.

Dr David McKeeson: Woodley, that's a nice Anglo-Saxon sounding name. I hope it's your own.

top

Species

1995

Xavier Fitch: We decided to make it female so it would be more docile and controllable. Preston Lennox: More docile and controllable, eh? You guys don't get out much.

Agent: Criminologist says there's no evidence of semen in the hot tub water. Preston Lennox: Well, maybe she took it with.

(while drinking Long Island Iced Tea) Dan Smithson, Empath: These are some good cups of tea, man.

Xavier Fitch: A train came through here about the time she escaped. Agent: Is she that fast? Xavier Fitch: She is *that* fast.

Dr Laura Baker: I got his answering machine. What should i say? Preston Lennox: Tell him he is about to copulate with a alien from outer space (laughs)

Preston Lennox: No-one ever asked me to find anything they didn't want dead.

top

Speech: Platform Posture and Appearance

1949

Narrator: Now just suppose you were a beautiful doll with rosy cheeks and big blue eyes, a doll that never talks.

Narrator: A good appearance is something that everyone should strive for, something everyone can accomplish.

Narrator: Good posture is a matter of the mind, your mind. In your thinking, you must convince yourself you will... think tall, talk tall, stand tall and walk tall.

top

Spellbound

2002/II

Harry Altman: Does this sound like a musical robot?

Harry Altman: (pointing to the boom microphone) Is this thing edible?

Ted's Mom: I think Ted's got the advantage of parents, who think he's great irregardless.

Former Spelling Bee winner: I don't think it really helped me, in my love live; my nascent love life. I think that having won something like that could be regarded as being a significant liability.

top

Spider Baby, or The Maddest Story Ever Told

1964

Virginia: I caught a big fat bug right in my spider web and now the spider gets to give the bug a big sting. Sting! Sting! Sting! Sting! Sting!

Bruno, The Chauffeur: Just because something isn't good doesn't mean it's bad.

Schlocker: This has gone well beyond the boundaries of prudence and good taste.

top

Split Second

1953

Larry Fleming: Well, Colonel, when you've seen one atom bomb, you've seen them all.

Larry Fleming: You don't think very much of people, do you? Sam Hurley: I don't think very much of anything.

Sam Hurley: You ever been locked up? Some people can stand it and some people can't. The ones who can't would kill themselves and anybody else just to get out for five minutes.

top

Spook Louder

1943

Larry: (having just hit Curly) Hey! I just saw a ghost! Curly: Was he a fat one? Larry: Yeah! Curly: THAT WAS ME!

Larry: How d'ya spell "fifty"? Moe: Put 'er down for seventy-five. Well-dressed woman: What did you say? Moe: I said it's good to be alive!

The Reporter: Professor, I can't stand it any longer! Who was throwing the pies? Prof. J. Ogden Denkfeather: Oh, I threw the pies! (starts laughing hysterically, then a cream pie hits him in the face)

Larry: WAIT A MINUTE! If we're the only ones here, then who's playin' the piano? Moe: What difference does that... ? (pauses, realizing the situation)

Larry: Did he say blood? Curly: I'm anemic!

top

Spyro 2: Ripto's Rage!

1999 (VG)

Spyro the Dragon: So, what are you, some sort of Goat? Elora the Faun: I'm a faun, you dork!

Ripto: You bought a dragon to Avalar? I hate dragons!

(first lines) Spyro the Dragon: Is this rain ever gonna stop? I've forgotten what the sun looks like. We should go on vacation! Somewhere warm... somewhere sunny... Dragon Shores! Yeah! I haven't been there since we kicked Gnasty Gnorcs butt! How about it Sparx, you up for a vacation at the beach? (they run towards the portal) Last one there is a Gnorc!

Ripto: Noooo! Crush! You may have been able to defeat that simpleton, but Gulp will be more than a match for you! Spyro the Dragon: Bring it on, shorty! Ripto: Gya! Naaaaaaah! Gulp, come here now! Destroy him, and make *sure* it's painful!

Bombo the Flagkeeper: Ha, you won't beat me, dragon!

top

Spyro: Year of the Dragon

2000 (VG)

Hunter: (on Bianca) Hey, is it just me or is she kinda cute when she's angry?

Moneybags: Spyro! You're just in luck! I just saw two thieves run through this door! Well... actually they paid me to guard their hideout, but that's irrelevant.

Moneybags: Heh heh... what a sucker... err, that is... It's a far, far better thing you do today, Spyro, than you have ever done, and... err... well so forth, et cetera, you get the idea.

Shui the Panda: Would you like to try some bamboo? It's very delicious!

(about Bianca) Hunter: You know, she's kind of cute when she's angry!

Smelt the Seal: You have a lot of talent for someone so purple!

Moneybags: Behind this door is the single greatest show on Earth! That's right! Ice dancing!

Moneybags: What are you saving your money for, another sequel?

top

Squartatore di New York, Lo

1982

(after performing an autopsy on a ripper murder victim) Dr Barry Jones, Coroner: He used a blade. Stuck it up her joy trail, and slit her wide open. He could have done a slightly better job if he had more time. But overall, it was a good, efficient butchery.

Chief of Police: Fred, have you flipped out, or are you trying to give me an ulcer? A smart-ass coroner comes out with a little verbal diarrhea, and you immediately go around declaring there's a maniac loose in the city. Lt Fred Williams: Yeah, so what do you want me to say? A boy scout's been wildling on girls with his knife?

top

St. Helens

1981

Harry Truman: (reading from his wife's recipe) "Baste duck every twenty minutes in cherry sauce." Cherry sauce. Dammit, Edie, how can I baste the duck in cherry sauce when I'm all out of sauce? I guess I'm gonna have to make a load of sauce. If I had any cherries, I could make a load of sauce. (to his dog) What're YOU looking at? The least you could do is set the table!

Otis Kaylor: Listen, if you don't back off, I'll kick your butt so far between your shoulder blades, you're gonna have to stand on your head to go to the john.

top

Stakeout

1987

(Reading the police profile on Maria McGuire.) Bill Reimers: And, the moment we've all been waiting for... 313 pounds. Chris Lecce: 313 pounds?! Bill Reimers: I would imagine that's fully clothed. Chris Lecce: Oh my God, she could be the house! I hate this job!

(After watching the svelte Maria McGuire undress) Bill Reimers: To protect and to serve. Chris Lecce: Ooo, I love my job, I love it so much! Bill Reimers: But I would appreciate it if you would not act like a walking hard-on while we're on the job. Chris Lecce: Succinctly put.

Richard "Stick" Montgomery: Isn't love great, Chris? One minute you're a god, the next minute you're a scum-suckin' pig.

(after Marie hit him) Richard "Stick" Montgomery: Don't you *ever* hit me.

top

Stalingrad

1993

One German foot soldier: Where are the horses? Another German foot soldier: We're the horses!

General Hentz: To sum it up, gentlemen... we're in deep shit.

Fritz Reiser: They say in Germany when you die as a soldier you are honored. That's something, isn't it? Siberia? Not for me. I'm cold enough.

Otto: You know we don't stand a chance. Why not surrender? Capt Hermann Musk: You know what would happen if we do. Otto: Do we deserve any better? Capt Hermann Musk: Otto, I'm not a Nazi. Otto: No, you're worse. Lousy officers. You went along with it all, even though you knew who was in charge. Hermann...

top

Stanley Kubrick: A Life in Pictures

2001

Shelley Duvall: (about working with Kubrick on the Shinning) Did you see Groundhog Day?

Jack Nicholson: Everyone pretty much acknowledges that he's the man, and I still feel that underrates him.

(Last lines) Christiane Kubrick: ... and he'd say, "I'm still fooling them!"

Peter Ustinov: He was originally known as a kind of future threat - a future threat to peace and quiet.

top

Star 80

1983

Snider: You won't forget Paul Snider.

Snider: I do love her. Dorothy's Mother: What did you say? Snider: I said I love her. Dorothy's Mother: Funny - I could've sworn you said 'I love IT.'

Snider: Well, you can take your magazine, you mansion and your movies and shove'em ALL up your ass now.

Snider: (after Dorothy strips on the bed) So you're gonna do me a big favor, huh? Ok, that's me - a charity case.

top

Star Wars: Battlefront II

2005 (VG)

Boba Fett, Jango Fett, Republic Officer 1, Retired Clone Trooper: Officially, there never was a "Clone Rebellion" on Kamino. Unofficially, approximately twenty years after we were created, a special detachment of the Imperial 501st Legion was dispatched to Kamino, with orders to eradicate an army of clones that had been bred to take arms against the Empire. Our mission commander, an expert on the inner workings of Kamino, was a young bounty hunter named Boba Fett...

top

Star Wars: Tie Fighter Collector's CD-ROM

1995 (VG)

Darth Vader: The rebels are unprepared for our attack. Signal Vice-Admiral Thrawn to launch his TIE squadrons immediately.

Vice-Admiral Thrawn: This rebel stronghold has no hope of escape! Commence the attack!

Emperor: The Empire is on the verge of success. Soon peace and order will be restored throughout the galaxy. Even now our forces led by Darth Vader are striking back at the Rebel insurgents.

Briefing Officer: The importance of this mission cannot be overemphasized. The Emperor IS the Empire!

top

Star

1982

Maya: Dil bhole boom boom boom... My heart sings boom boom boom...

Dev Kumar: Ek do kahene bhi do, teen char ho gaya pyar, main to chala jaise bahar... One two, let me say, three four fall in love, I move forward like spring...

Maya: Yeh dil tere liye hai, yeh jaan tere liye hai... My heart is for you, my life is for you...

top

Starship Titanic

1998 (VG)

The Bomb: The ship is now armed and preparing to explode. This will be a fairly large explosion, so you'd best keep back about 22 miles.

Shorbut Sweet aka Succ-U-Bus: You want suck? I suck. You want blow? I blow. You want intellectual disputation? I got a big belch. (belches)

Parrot: Chicken, chicken, squawk, oh bliss! Oh bleeding heck, this chicken's cold! What's this, some sort of low-calorie fob-off? Where's the steaming fat? Where's the hot running grease? This is no chicken - this is some dirty no-good health food!

top

Starting Over

2003

Maureen: Cassie asked me in the kitchen if I showered. "Why don't you shower?" Well, fuck you, I bathe!

Nyanza: What do you want to be? Andy: Happy... (in the confessional) Nyanza: (snaps her fingers) Now, that's real!

Nyanza: (in the confessional) Your eye itches because your hands are dirty, and you rub your eyes. You scratch your hair, you scratch your skin, then you rub your eyes. You clean your glasses, then you rub your eyes. I really don't know at this point if you're taking showers, because me, I can scratch my hair all day.

Nyanza: Maureen, your lack of class is showing.

Lori: (after getting her heart broken) This, by the way, is what we call, "A Step Back."

(Teresa is talking to her daughter, Brittany, on the phone) Teresa Crone: You don't want to end up like your momma, do you? Brittany: Um, is that a rhetorical question?

top

Starving Artists

1997

Bert: Hey, did you know the fake blood is mint-flavored? Jay: Bert, what did I tell you about eating the props? Now go wash your mouth out with soap. You look like a fucking vampire.

Bob: They're hit men, Zach! They shoot people in their apartment. Zach: If they were hit men, they wouldn't shoot people in their own apartment. That's got to be one of the last professions that still makes housecalls.

top

State Fair

1945

Harry Ware: Biggest boar in the world, I bet. Margy Frake: All depends on how you spell it.

Margy Frake: Ohh... but the house you live in.. Harry Ware: It's got to be the same. No old clabbered shingle business. There is a new kind of plastic, pre-fabricated job. I want you to see it at the catalog home. Margy Frake: Is it pretty? Harry Ware: Sure, but whats more important it's termite proof. Wait 'til you see it, they tell you how to furnish it too. No rugs or carpets, there just dust collecters... Linolium through the whole house, wait until you see the pictures, it's sleek and smooth easy to keep clean... well it's like every room in the house was a Bathroom! Margy Frake: Sounds real cozy...

top

State of the Union

1948

Mary Matthews: Oh, that's silly. No woman could ever run for President. She'd have to admit she's over 35.

Jim Conover: You're the most beautiful plank in your husband's platform.

Mary Matthews: It's a small request, but I'd give anything for a good smack on the south end.

Lulubelle: I haven't enjoyed myself this much since Huey Long died!

top

Stealing Home

1988

Billy Wyatt: The Dink is Appleby's stepfather. Alan Appleby: He wears black socks with sandals and Bermuda shorts, smokes Parliaments and drives a Lark.

Teenage Alan Appleby: You had sex with my prom date.

Teenage Billy Wyatt: It's like everything's normal, but i don't give a shit about any of it.

top

Steel

1997

Uncle Joe: Well dip me in shit and roll me in breadcrumbs.

Sgt. Marcus: Where did that son-of-a-buck go? Young Cop: The Batcave?

John Henry Irons: I can imagine how you feel. (about her being crippled) Susan Sparks: No. No you can't. John Henry Irons: You're right. I can't

Susan Sparks: Sometimes shit happens.

Uncle Joe: (referring to a hammer) I did the ironwork myself, I especially like the shaft.

Nathaniel Burke: Eat the hot dog, don't be one!

Uncle Joe: Look-it here, boy! You ain't Superman! And you damn sure ain't gettin' paid!

top

Still Smokin

1983

(as a Jamaican dope dealer in TV movie) Cheech: (singing) Dope! Do-o-o-o-pe! How come nobody don't want to buy no dope? Dope, I say dope I say do-o-o-o-o-pe. Who wants to buy dope?

Chong: (sings) Got one leg on my shoulder. Two legs on my shoulder. (muffled singing continues)

Cheech: We should have a dope-a-thon. You know try to raise money for like all the people that lost there crops.

Chong: You know I could be your daddy Cheech: you could be my daddy, man? Chong: yeah, I used to fuck buffalo.

top

Stitch! The Movie

2003 (V)

Dr Hamsterviel: Shut up with your not-shutting-up!

Dr Hamsterviel: (to Jumba) You, with your four eyes and inexplicable accent!

Pleakley: Maybe the Grand Councilwoman will let us come home with her this time! (Jumba and Pleakley watch the GCW's ship blast off.) Pleakley: (sigh) I'll get the wig...

(Gantu is asked who Lilo is) Gantu: A little Earth girl who can be a huge pain in the rear.

Lilo: You had coffee today didn't you? Stitch: Coconut cake and coffee!

Dr Jacques von Hamsterviel: You think you are so super strong, with your 'I can lift three-thousand times my own weight!' Well, that is exactly why I designed these restraints to hold your weight... (the camera zooms out) Dr Jacques von Hamsterviel: ... times three-thousand and one!

top

Stone Cold

1991/I

Chains: God forgives. The Brotherhood doesn't.

Chains: This reminds me of my father's last words: "Don't son, that gun is loaded!"

John Stone: Imagine the future, Chains, 'cause you're not in it.

(to John Stone) Ice: You look like a grown-up version of Bam-Bam.

(after beating up three would-be grocery store robbers) John Stone: You better clean up on aisle four.

Ice: You gonna use that stick, or you wanna dance with me?

top

Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot

1992

Bomowski: Stop or my mom will shoot!

Tutti Bomowski: His ass was the grass and I was the lawnmower.

Tutti Bomowski: Stop! Stop that man Joe. Stop that man! (Joe tackles the man) Tutti Bomowski: I saw that man on America's Most Wanted. Joe Brofmowski: What did he do? Tutti Bomowski: He killed his mother.

Tutti Bomowski: (pointing the gun at her son) Go ahead! Make your bed.

top

A Story Never Told Before

2005

Dorothy: Auschwitz is the most wonderful of all places. It is here more than in any other black hole in the universe that a man can at once glimpse the true meaning of existence. It is here more than in any other corner of hell, that a man - if he is properly prepared for it -is booted out of his cocoon, forced from his infantile imaginings: himself presented to Himself, sir to Sire.

Ginevra: Art - true Art ought to transport you to a place you have never been before. Gregory: You see art as a transport system, a bus of sorts. Ginevra: Well, it is, isn't it? Isn't that why we go to the movies, to be taken on a voyage?

Gregory: It's as if there is now two of me! Dr Pick: Go on, Mr Goodwin. Gregory: And me, the new me - I think he's the new me - looks out at me - the old me - as if he were some kind of interesting stranger!

top

Strada, La

1954

The Fool: What a funny face! Are you a woman, really? Or an artichoke?

The Fool: Maybe he loves you? Gelsomina: Me? The Fool: Why not? He is like dogs. A dog looks at you, wants to talk, and only barks.

The Fool: I am ignorant, but I read books. You won't believe it, everything is useful... this pebble for instance. Gelsomina: Which one? The Fool: Anyone. It is useful. Gelsomina: What for? The Fool: For... I don't know. If I knew I'd be the Almighty, who knows all. When you are born and when you die... Who knows? I don't know for what this pebble is useful but it must be useful. For if its useless, everything is useless. So are the stars!

top

Straight Talk

1992

'Dr.' Shirlee Kenyon: Get down off the cross, honey. Somebody needs the wood.

'Dr.' Shirlee Kenyon: Why even the Declaration of Independence only guaranties life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. It doesn't say anything about fair. Doesn't even say you have the right to be happy. Just to pursue it. Female Caller: But no one appreciates me, and I try to be fair, and they don't - 'Dr.' Shirlee Kenyon: Get down off the cross honey, somebody needs the wood!

'Dr.' Shirlee Kenyon: Money is made to be spent. What goods it doin' in the bottom of my panty drawer?

top

Stranded

2002 (TV)

Ernst Robinson: Girls. If it weren't for girls, I'd never go back. Would you? Fritz Robinson: What about books? You'd go back for books. Ernst Robinson: Well, obviously books! But apart from girls and books... Fritz Robinson: Music. Ernst Robinson: True. Fritz Robinson: So, apart from music, food, books, and girls, you'd stay on our island. (long pause) And Jacob. (long pause) You know, if he's found his way back to London, he's probably having a wonderful time with the music, food, books, and girls. In fact, he's probably thinking "If it weren't for the music, food, books, and girls, I'd go back there and search for my family."

top

Strange Love

2005

Brigitte Nielsen: Okay, I need a drink to take this in.

Flavor Flav: That aint our business! Brigitte Nielsen: But I'm scared! People are always getting shot here!

Flavor Flav: (to Brigitte) I'm sorry... I love you... no lie.

Flavor Flav: No... no... I don't eat fish. Get me some chicken! Brigitte Nielsen: Foofy foofy, just try it.

top

Strange Luck

1995

(opening narration) Chance Harper: People say I'm... lucky. It all began in a plane crash thirty years ago. One hundred and six lives ending in a single heartbeat. No one survived... except me.

Eric: If anything happens to me that sounds suspicious and you hear about it, I'd like you to do me a favor and call a friend of mine. He works at the FBI. he's one of the only people I can really trust. His name is Mulder.

Chance Harper: Do you know what it is? Billy-Mac: What do I look like, Alfred Einstein?

Chance Harper: Camping's good. I like camping. Camping is something nice, normal people do, when they want to do something nice... and normal.

Chance Harper: There's an old Chinese curse: "May you live in interesting times."

top

Stranger on the Third Floor

1940

Michael Ward: Did you ever want to kill a man? Martin: My son, there's murder in every intelligent man's heart.

The Stranger: I want a couple of hamburgers... and I'd like them raw.

Jane: Why do they want to lock you up? The Stranger: So they can hurt me. They put you in a shirt with long sleeves and they pour ice water on you.

The Stranger: They send you to take me back? Jane: No, who? The Stranger: Don't you know? The people who lock you up.

top

Strawberry Shortcake in Big Apple City

1981 (TV)

The Peculiar Purple Pieman of Porcupine Peak: Oh, I do want that pretty gazebo!

Butterfly: Mind over butter, you know.

Strawberry Shortcake: I'm just an out-of-towner.

The Peculiar Purple Pieman of Porcupine Peak: Hoisted by my own petard!

(The Purple Pieman puts a tray of kohlrabi cookies into the oven. The oven makes a gagging sound.) The Peculiar Purple Pieman of Porcupine Peak: Everybody's a critic nowadays.

top

Street Angels

1993 (V)

District Attorney: When you cash in your chips, you don't mess around, do you?

Tamara: Maybe *you* were finished, Frank, but did you ever stop to think that maybe I loved you?

(after shooting his girlfriend for laughing at another guy's jokes) The Phantom: That'll teach you to disturb me when I'm drinking.

Frank Adams: Must have been agonizing - his heart exploded in his chest.

top

Street Fighter II: The World Warrior

1991 (VG)

Ryu: You must defeat Sheng Long to stand a chance!

Chun Li: I'm the strongest woman in the world!

Guile: Are you man enough to fight with me?

Sagat: You are not a warrior; you're a beginner!

Ken: Attack me if you dare - I will crush you.

Blanka: Seeing you in action is a joke.

Dhalsim: Now you realize the inner mysteries of yoga.

E Honda: It's natural for a sumo to be the world's stongest

Zangief: Next time we meet I'm gonna break your arms!

top

Street Fighter Zero

1995 (VG)

Sakura: I like Street Fighting better than sparring in Rival Schools!

Birdie: Oh, what?... Before? I looked pale because I was sick!

Cammy White: Minor damage... Memory error! What am I doing here... ?

Dan Hibiki: Sore loser! Don't go around beating up inanimate objects!

Cody: After waiting so long, it feels good to do more than two moves!

Charlie: I'm sorry... Are you mad at me? Did I "tick" you off? Ha! Ha!

Gen: We will all die. The question is when, why, and how painfully.

Guile: No handcuffs? Fighting isn't what it used to be!

top

Streets of Laredo

1995 (mini)

Maria Garza: What have you done? Joey Garza: I killed a gringo, Mama. I only like gringos when they're dead.

Laurie Parker: Whose funeral? Tinkersley: Why, it's Doobie Plunkert's. She was well liked in the town. I like her myself even though I only met her once. That's why I let my whores sing at her funeral. Now, I kept two back for business. They had scratchy voices anyhow.

Blacksmith: Hardin, that boy cost me 50 dollars. That's 50 dollars for the boy and 50 cents for the grave. That's $50.50 you owe me. John Wesley Hardin: Don't stand there talking nonsense to me while I'm working hard at getting drunk. Just drag your man off behind the sand hill and the big pig will eat him, and save you 50 cents.

top

Strike Zone

2003

Cameron: 2-1 with a runner on first and no outs? Jesus, that is not in our favor. That is not in our favor. Fifteen minutes is all we've got left, guys. Fifteen minutes, two innings, and six outs. Fifteen minutes, I don't give a damn what you do with your lives after this. I don't care if you never play this game again. But this championship's your gift to me, if nothing else than this. I want you to pitch the hardest your arm will let you throw the ball. I want you guys to run the fastest and the hardest that your legs will carry you, because if there is one thing I've learned from all I've been through, it's that you only regret the things that you didn't do. No regrets, guys. Not tonight.

top

Stryker's War

1985

Cult Leader: You dirty little son of a bitch! I'm gonna do some nasty things to you.

Sgt. Walker J. Jackson: (holding up a dead rat he just stabbed with his bayonet) This sucker's confirmed! Payback's a motherfucker!

Cult Leader: You can't shoot me. I am the Savior returned to Earth, The Messiah, come to lead the people to righteousness. I am Jesus Christ. SSgt. Jack Stryker: No you're not - you're dead.

Cult Leader: Don't you ever touch the sacrificial fluids... okey dokey?

top

What Price Glory

1952

Lt Moore: What about those three men who were supposed to go up to Le Mans to get the Croix de Guerre? Captain Flagg: Oh, yeah. Yes, yes. All right, get 'em out of the guardhouse and have 'em take a bath and send 'em over with an MP escort.

Captain Flagg: Quirt loves the bottle, and when he's drunk he is the lousiest, filthiest tramp that ever wore a uniform. He's even worse than I am, and you know I don't allow anybody to get as bad as that.

Captain Flagg: It's a lousy war, kid... but it's the only one we've got.

Pvt. Lewisohn: You speak English very well. Nicole Bouchard: Sister Cecile does not permit that we speak French in English class. Pvt. Lewisohn: Well, I can tell you how glad I am that you've Sister Cecile for a teacher. Nicole Bouchard: Thank you, also my father does not permit that I speak to American soldier... in any language.

Find these movie quotes interesting? Enjoy more classic quotes: