Film Dialogue 10

The Dark Side of the Moon

1990

Dreyfuss Steiner: You had a choice. You all had a choice. Giles Stewart: No I still have a choice. Maybe I cant destroy you, but if it's gods will, then so be it. If not, then I'll see you in hell!

The Dave Gorman Collection

2001

Dave Gorman: Hello, my name is Dave Gorman.

The Dawn Patrol

1938

Capt Courtney: Man is a savage animal, who, periodically to relieve his nervous tension, tries to destroy himself.

The Dawn Trail

1930

Sheriff Larry Williams: A lock is a lock. If something's locked, it's locked.

The Day of the Locust

1975

Claude Estee: Sometimes I wonder what we're doing here... grown men making mud pies to sell to the great unwashed.

The Day the Universe Changed

1985

James Burke: ... and then things took an encouraging turn for the so-so.

The Dead Hate the Living!

2000

(as zombies are about to break in) David Poe: What would Bruce Campbell do?

Paul: You want me to throw a TV at them?!

The Dead Pit

1989

Christian Meyers: For dead people they sure are smart.

Sister Clair: The shadows draw near! Make your confession!

Dr Colin Ramzi: I've done life; now I'm doing death.

Jane Doe: The people in the cellar need help! Let them out!

The Deadly Bees

1966

Mary Hargrove: The dog's meat, have you seen it?

The Deadly Mantis

1957

Dr Ned Jackson: In all the kingdom of the living, there is no more deadly or voracious creature than the Preying Mantis.

Dr Ned Jackson: I'm convinced that we're dealing with a Mantis in whose geological world the smallest insects were as large as man, and now failing to find those insects as food, well... it's doing the best that it can.

The Death of Daniel Whately

2004

Daniel J. Whately: It's... for the art.

Molly Morgan: I just got this one script where me, Shaquille O'Neil, and the Ninja Turtles jump in the Pepsi time machine, and go save the Olsen twins from the Veggie Tales.

Teen Movie Sidekick: Ohhhhh, snap! No... you... didn't!

The Defender

2004

President of the United States: You messed with the wrong country and you fucked the wrong President!

The Delicate Art of Parking

2003

Harriet: (visibly drunk, hitting on Lonny) Where are you going? Lonny: Uh, we've got to take the camera back. Harriet: I can carry a camera.

Grant Parker: Discomfort is the first pill to swallow on the road to change.

The Demon

1979/I

(Explaining his ESP) Col Bill Carson: Sometimes I get these... feelings. Vibes, as the kids would say.

Joan Parker: Did your extrasensory perception prepare you for this? (shoots Carson in the head)

The Dentist

1932

Dentist: That kid's so dumb he doesn't even know what time it is. Charley Frobisher: By the way, what time is it? Dentist: I don't know.

Dentist: Now, have you ever had this tooth pulled, before?

Dentist: Get those teeth out of there, they're in my lie.

The Deputy

2004 (TV)

Security Guard: I need to see your pass. Bob Galway: I've lost it. Security Guard: Lost it? Bob Galway: Yes, "lost". As in "I've just lost my job as a security guard." (Security guard reluctantly lets Bob Galway into building)

The Desert Hawk

1944

Faud: Ambition cares not whose blood it spills.

The Desert Hawk

1950

Omar: Wench or princess, a woman is only a woman, and always needs a master.

The Desert Song

1953

Azuri: It's you - the one with the face! Benjy Kidd: It's you - the one with the body!

The Desire Vampire

1982 (TV)

(last words) Marge Bookman: Pat! Pat, your ride's here and my feet are killing me!

(famous Last Words) Marge Bookman: Pat! Pat, your ride's here and my feet are killing me.

The Detectives

1993

Detective Constable David 'Dave' Ian Lovelace Briggs: (Dave and Bob are dressed as hippies to get into a road protesters' camp) You're loving this, aren't you? Detective Constable Robert 'Bob' Elvis Aaron Louis: (flicking his long blonde wig around) What? Detective Constable David 'Dave' Ian Lovelace Briggs: Having hair.

The Devil-Doll

1936

Lavond (as Madame Mandelip) : Once you're in my shop, I'll wager you'll do anything I ask.

The Devil Is a Sissy

1936

Hilda Pierce: (on New York City) Well, all I see is squalor and dirt. And unpleasantly thwarted people.

The Devil's Rain

1975

Mark Preston: CORBIS! God damn you!

Jonathan Corbis: Who calls me from out of the Pit?

The Diane Linkletter Story

1969

Art Linkletter: No, she wouldn't lie. Well, yes, she would lie... But not to us.

Diane: I am what I am! I'm doin' my own thing in my own time, Daddy!

Diane: Jim's a groovy guy!

The Dirty Monks

2004 (V)

Jim Moore: I know you dream of me. You'd better take advantage of me now before you start to sag and I lose interest.

Norm: Did you know that plastic utensils were introduced because of the F-4 Phantom fighter jet?

The Discovery of Heaven

2001

Max: I've discovered you, you bastards!

The Disputation

1986 (TV)

Rabbi Moses: When the lion invites the mouse to a disputation, your majesty, the mouse, however fond he may be of arguing, would do well to avoid the disputation if he can; for the poor mouse does not know which to fear most: losing the argument or winning it.

The Divorcee

1930

Jerry Bernard Martin: (slipping on a diamond ring) Oh, I couldn't think of accepting such a valuable gift! Offscreen man: But, my dear, my feeling for you is purely platonic. Jerry Bernard Martin: Really? I've heard of platonic love, but I didn't know there was such a thing as platonic jewellery.

The Dixie Fryer

1960

(Foghorn has gotten his beak shot off by a chicken hawk) Foghorn Leghorn: That's the first time someone else shot my mouth off.

The Docks of New York

1928

Bill Roberts: Are you goin' to let me have a good time in my own quiet way, or must I take this place apart?

Lou: Until I got married, I was decent.

The Doctor and the Devils

1985

Doctor Thomas Rock: I set myself up as a God over death.

The Doctor

1991

June Ellis: I pray. I meditate. I eat chocolate. I dance.

The Doctor

2005 (V)

The Doctor: Go suck a lemon, faggot!

The Domestication of the Incredible LMNO Robot

2005

Mother: Are you listening to me? Look at me. Having a robot is a big responsibility.

The Door with Seven Locks

1940

Judy Lansdowne: When I was fifteen I spun a coin. Tails, home girl, cooking and knitting. Heads, adventure. Heads it was!

Insp. Cornelius 'Andy' Sneed: Women are like tiger cats. They ought to be caged at sixteen and shot at twenty!

Judy Lansdowne: I love frolicking in morgues.

The Doorway

2000

Owen: Well, the bitch floats!

The Double Garden

1970

Dr Bragan: How in the hell can anybody be so utterly stupid as to build a rocket base on the coast of Florida?

The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath

2003

Nyarlathotep: Shun, then, the outer hells and stick to the things of your youth.

Merchant: One searches for gods, yet claims humility? The stories I could tell of presumption.

The Driven Man

1999

Narrator: The Man makes a decision and becomes... a decision maker.

The Drowning Pool

1975

J.H. Kilbourne: I ran a check on you, Mr Harper. You are not stupid. Lew Harper: I have my moments.

J.H. Kilbourne: You wanna live, don't you? To a ripe old age? Lew Harper: I'd hate to think that I was making those Social Security payments for nothing.

The Drums of Jeopardy

1931

Abbie Krantz: Dead or alive, Kitty Conover, you oughtn't have a man in your room at this hour of the night.

The Duel

1995

Neon Edge: Of all the abominations on this cursed earth, you're the most cowardly!

The Dukes of Hazzard: Hazzard in Hollywood

2000 (TV)

Narrator: Can make some male appendages harder than Chinese arithmetic.

The DuPont Show of the Week

1961

(from opening monologue in Episode 1.1) Narrator: Why, they even say that old Ben Franklin wasn't allowed to write the Declaration of Independence for fear he'd put a joke in it.

The Early Bird

1965

Mr Grimsdale: Besides, we're beaten Pitkin. Consolidated's too big. Norman Pitkin: Oh. You was at Dunkirk, weren't you Mr Grimsdale? I wonder what would have happened if you'd given up then. Mr Grimsdale: You're right Pitkin. We'll fight them, to the last half pint of milk!

The Easter Bunny Is Comin' to Town

1977 (TV)

King Bruce: What do you do with these easter eggs? Sunny the Easter Bunny: Um... Good question.

The Echo

1998 (TV)

Michael Deacon: I've had two wives and I fucked my brains out trying to express my love for both of them. It was a waste of time. Lawrence: My dear fellow. So much fucking for so little result. How terribly exhausting for you!

The Edwardian Country House

2002 (mini)

(regarding Edwardian society) Mister Edgar - the Butler: Without truth, society is sick, and it can't really survive. And it was swept away.

The Elephants' Graveyard

1976 (TV)

Jody: You get neither chance nor choice. You leave school and straight to work without even thinking about it. Then you get married without even knowing about it. Then spend the rest of your days using both as an excuse for never have done anything with your life.

The Ellen Show

2001

Connie Gibson: (Connie, the bus driver, has been fired) You drove right over my heart, and you didn't even signal. Ellen Richmond: If that isn't a country song... it really should be.

The Emperor's New Clothes

1953

Emperor: Emperors don't stick their necks out. They stick somebody else's.

The Enchanted Cottage

1945

Mrs Abigail Minnett: (as aircraft bombs are heard in the distance) Maybe sooner than you think.

The End of Violence

1997

Mike Max: Perversely. That's one thing I think I can define now. It's when things are upside down and you start to like 'em that way.

Ray Bering: I'm a computer scientist. This is Hollywood. What's not strange?

The End Runner

2003

The Bag Man: Suck on this li'l Bitch! You like that, huh?

The Endless Summer 2

1994

(As a pride of Lions attack the buggy they're driving in) Patrick O'Connell: I thought the locals at Huntington were mean!

The Entertainer

1960

Billy Rice: You were a pretty little thing. Not that looks are important - not even for a woman. You don't look at the mantelpiece when you poke the fire.

Archie Rice: (to unresponsive audience) Don't clap too loudly, it's a very old building.

The Eurovision Song Contest

1985 (TV)

Host: (when congratulating the winners) I'm honestly very happy that this happened because Norway has been last so many times that you really deserve it.

The Evil That Men Do

1984

Holland: He knows we're here. Rhiana Hidalgo: How do you know? Holland: He didn't ask.

The Executioner's Song

1982 (TV)

Gary Mark Gilmore: Go down on me, partner ... I need it Nicole Baker: Don't call me partner. Gary Mark Gilmore: No, darlin'... I love it... I love it Nicole Baker: Yeah, you and seven other motherfuckers.

The Expert

1995

Martin Kagan: Life is good - love is better.

Dr Alice Barnes: My father treated prisoners like animals.

Warden Munsey: We all have a dark place, and I don't like to visit mine, but I will if I have to.

John Lomax: It's never gonna be over for me.

Snake: Splatter that son of a bitch!

The Experts

1989

Travis: (about the citizens of Indian Springs) Where are we gonna put them? They can't stay at my place.

The Eyes of Tammy Faye

2000

Jim Bakker: I wanna send you this beautiful rice patty baby!

Jim Bakker: With your donation of $500, I will send you this beautiful rice patty baby!

The Facts of Life Reunion

2001 (TV)

Jamie: "Whats everyone staring at?"

The Falcon and the Co-eds

1943

Eustace L. Harley, the undertaker: Can I help you? Tom Lawrence, the Falcon: Not just yet.

The Fall of the Roman Empire

1964

Timonides: (after Ballomar threatens to blind Timondes) Let's look upon this logically. . .

Commodus: Livius, if you listen very carefully, you can hear the gods laughing!

Livius: You're beautiful. Lucilla: You're beautiful.

The Fallen Ones

2005 (TV)

Aramis: I will fight! I will survive!

The Family Tree

2001

Ruth: "What the matter daddy? Jealous that it's a needle in me and not your d*ck!?" Rose: "What's this bitch doen for you!?" Gus: "She doesn't talk back and she gives great head!"

The Family Way

1966

Ezra Fitton: He walked in 'ere like it were a public convenience

Ezra Fitton: All this reading books he does, it's not natural. Lucy Fitton: You wouldn't know what natural is. Ezra Fitton: My father always used to say if it were natural you'd see animals doing it. I never saw a horse reading.

The Fantastic Escape

2005

Warden: I must be doing something right.

The Far Country

1954

Jeff Webster: I don't need other people. I don't need help. I can take care of me.

The Farmer Takes a Wife

1953

Lucy Cashdollar: Don't forget, I'm a five time widow, and when they died they all left me everything they owned. Rest their souls. Fortune Friendly: What do you want with me? I'm broke. Lucy Cashdollar: Well, I figure after five rich husbands, the next one would be on the house.

The Farmer's Wife

1928

(first lines) Sibley Sweetland: ... and don't forget to air your Master's pants, 'Minta.

(last lines) Samuel Sweetland: And if anybody knows a woman with a gentler heart and a straighter back and a nobler character, I'd like to see her.

The Favor

1994

Kathy Whiting: I was kind of happy, in a miserable kind of way. Peter Whiting: Is that worse than being miserable in a happy kind of way?

The Feathered Serpent

1948

Charlie Chan: Man who improve house before building solid foundation apt to run into very much trouble.

The Fighting 69th

1940

Father Duffy: When did an Irishman need a prayer in a fight?

Jerry Plunkett: Now go tell the sergeant he wants you.

The Final Chapter: Forgotten Realms - Baldur's Gate II: Throne of Bhaal

2001 (VG)

Cespenar the Imp: Cool bastard sword! Why bastard, you think? No parent?

The Final Cut

1995/II (TV)

(Prime Minister Urquhart is watching Makepeace being interviewed on television) Tom Makepeace: To quote the prime minister, "You might very well think that. I couldn't possibly comment." Francis Urquhart: You bastard!

The Final Play

2002

Det. Darryl Johnson: I just don't understand why I would kill my wife. (Director throws script at Darryl) Play Director: Because it's in the damn script, that's why!

The Final Programme

1973

Jerry Cornelius: Fuck off, you Greek maniac!

The Firefly

1937

Don Diego: You have one bad habit. Nina Maria Azara: Oh, yes? What? Don Diego: You're always saying good-bye. Nina Maria Azara: Very well then, I won't say good-bye. I'll just go!

The Firm

1988 (TV)

Bex Bissell: (shouts) I need the buzz!

Bex Bissell: That's almost funny.

The First Nudie Musical

1976

John Smithee: Shit we can make a fucking good bitch of a bastard movie if we all pull together and work as a whore-loving cunt-penis team.

The First Olympics: Athens 1896

1984 (TV)

Baron Pierre de Coubertin: (The problem of international cooperation) The Germans mistrust the French because we are starting the whole thing. The English mistrust the Germans on principle...

The Five Senses

1999

Robert: You look good. Rona: Of course I look good; all I do is fuck and eat.

The Flash II: Revenge of the Trickster

1991 (V)

The Trickster: Is the executioner ready to carry out sentence? The Flash (brandishing array of death weapons) : Uh... no. I can't decide - WHICH TO USE! The Trickster (guffawing) : Well! That's why they call me the hanging judge...

The Flash

1990 (TV)

(after creating his first sonic boom) Barry Allen: I think I'm startin' to like this.

Pike: Who are you? Where did you come from? The Flash: I came from you, Pike! You made me...

The Flim-Flam Man

1967

Mordecai Jones: Son, you'd be amazed at the hundreds of satisfied students I've matriculated over the last 50 years!

Curley: They catch us now, they gonna hang us!

The Flip Wilson Show

1970

(repeated line) Geraldine: Back off, Jack.

(repeated line) Geraldine: You've got a lot of nerve, honey.

Geraldine: What you see is what you get.

Geraldine: You should have been a lawyer instead of a client.

The Fluffer

2001/I

Aunty: What are you drinking? Sean: Bourbon and Coke. Aunty: The very drink Tallulah cried out for on her deathbed.

The Flying Deuces

1939

(Stan and Ollie have just heard that they will be executed the next day) Oliver: Shot at sunrise! Stanley: I hope it's cloudy tomorrow!

The Flying Nun

1967

Sister Bertrille: Could you please help? I'll give you five percent of the profit! Carlos Ramirez: Sister Bertrille... Five per cent of nothing is *still* nothing!!

The Footy Show

1994

Billy Brownless: An eye's worth half a testicle.

Trevor Marmalade: I avoid clichés like the plague.

The Footy Show

1995

Reg Reagan: Bring back the biff.

Reg Reagan: I'm Reg Reagan, go and get stuffed!

Reg Reagan: (during a football match) Rip the bludgers heads off!

Reg Reagan: (about Andrew Johns) Best player in the world, my arse.

Trent the Flight Steward: I miss John Hopoate.

The Foreigner

1978

Max Menace: When we dream that we dream, we are beginning to wake up.

The Forest

1983 (V)

Jennifer: Run, or Daddy will eat you.

The Fountainhead

1949

Ellsworth Toohey: We're alone. Why don't you tell me what you think of me. Howard Roark: But I don't think of you.

(to Roark, regarding the Wynand Building) Gail Wynand: Build it as a monument to that spirit which is yours - and could have been mine.

The Four Feathers

1939

Dr Harraz: Why worry? Be a coward and be happy.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse

1921

Dona Luisa: Is it not enough to lead my son into wild ways without teaching my daughter the tango? Madriaga: Will you have the boy grow up like those glass-eyed, carrot-topped sharks of your sister's?

The Fox

1967

(repeated line) Jill Banford: Oh March, you're terrible!

Paul Renfield: How come you've never married? You're not bad looking... You've never had a man. That's your problem.