Ernest Rides Again
1993
Ernest: Boy this is great! This is just like that John Wayne movie when he and Sundance were in Bulgaria. Abner: Bolivia. They were in Bolivia. Wait a minute, they were killed in Bolivia. Ernest: Well maybe they should've stayed in Bulgaria.
Abner: Look, consider the ramifications! Ernest: We don't have any ramifications, all we've got is this cannon!
Ernest: Know what I mean?
Ernest: Isn't that one of those lizards that when its tail falls off, it can grow another lizard?
Abner: I'm a professor with two Ph.D.'s, so why is it I'm running around with a refugee from Sesame Street?
Chorus: (singing) There once was a man named Worrell. Ernest P. Worrell/Let's celebrate this champion, this paragon of virtue/And should you be his foe, he'll be sorry if he hurts you/To some he's just a man while to others he's a beacon/He sends his mother cash and he calls her every weekend/He's punctual, he's affable, he's never quick to quarrel/He's Worrell, he's Ernest P. Worrell!
Abner: I left my detector! Ernest: So did I! Abner: But it was a Ten Co. Ernest: Mine was an Eleven-Co.
Abner: Ernest, are you dead? Ernest: I guess I would be if I weren't just *that* close to being an actual cartoon.
Ernest: Why the long face? I thought you were a "hysterical" professor.
Ernest: Could it be? Is it possible? (Unearths a bicycle seat) It is! It's Cleopatra's crystal skull!
Abner: You need a CAT Scan, Ernest!