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Empty Nest

1988

Dr Harry Weston: When you name your daughter Rita, you should probably expect a slut.

Carol Weston: My biggest fear is that there is no such thing as PMS and that this is who I really am.

Dorothy Zbornak: How do you do. I'm Dorothy Zbornak. Laverne Higby Todd Kane: Geriatrics is two doors down on the left.

Officer Barbara Weston: (cooking) Charley, don't you want to stay for dinner? Charley Dietz: I don't know, Barbara. It smells real bad.

Charley Dietz: I don't wanna change my image at all. I'm happy with who I am. Carol Weston: Mistake.

Dr Harry Weston: Laverne, I've just told a ten-year-old boy that he's become a woman! Laverne Higby Todd Kane: Then he'll probably be wanting a second opinion

(repeated line) Carol Weston: I am sick!

Officer Barbara Weston: Charley, why do you have beef jerky in your pocket? Charley Dietz: Maybe I'm just pleased to see you.

Charley Dietz: Hi all. Feed me. Carol Weston: To what?

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