Earth Girls Are Easy
1988
Woody: Waste your brain; wax your board; pray for waves.
Candy: Have a mental margarita.
Valerie: As if things weren't bad enough, now I've been abducted by aliens.
Candy: Just because they're aliens doesn't mean they can't be dates.
Valerie: Eat me, I'm a cupcake!
(Ted sees a bowling ball embedded in his computer monitor) Ted: But they said the Commodore would withstand anything!
Valerie: I didn't want you to think Earth girls were easy. Mac: What is "easy"? Valerie: (kissing him) This is "easy".
Candy: I see split ends are universal. Lost in space with no conditioner, eh?
Valerie: No, this is the Valley. Finland is the capital of Norway.
Mac: Are we limp and hard to manage?
(from the song "'Cause I'm A Blonde") Candy: I took an IQ test and I flunked it, of course / I can't spell VW, but I got a Porsche.
(from the song "'Cause I'm A Blonde") Candy: I just want to say that being chosen as this month's Miss August is like a compliment I'll remember for as long as I can. Right now I'm a freshman in my fourth year at UCLA, but my goal is to become a veterinarian, 'cause I love children.
(from the song "'Cause I'm A Blonde") Candy: 'Cause I'm a blonde! B-L-... I don't know!
Woody: (on the phone to Valerie, as cops attack him) I gotta go, Val - I'm gettin' my butt kicked!
Candy: If you wanna be a femme fatale, you can't rest on your L'Oréals!
Candy: Grab the bleach, she's seen the light!
Mac: Uh, Joe, take us to hospital, please. (smiles) Joe the Cop: Hey, clown, you're going to the slammer! Mac: (looks at Mike the cop, then at Valerie) We go to slammer first.
Valerie: Mac, use your love touch on them. Then they'll come on to me, they'll be putty in my hands. Mac: You want sex with Joe and Mike?