Buying the Cow
2002
Mike Hanson: You should stop drinking. Girl in Bar: Why? I just got here. Mike Hanson: Because you're driving me home.
(opens car door to see Mike Kissing a girl) Tyler Carter Bellows: I thought you said you're gay. Mike Hanson: Yeah, and your point is?
Mike: Always a best man, never a man.
Mike: A blind man could smell your love.
Nicole: That's when you need to say, "Buddy boy, it's time to shit or get off the pot." Sarah: And I would be the "shit" part of that analogy?
Jonesy: You're still not telling us everything. David Collins: Of course not, you're my friends.
David Collins: You're the only people I've ever told. Mike Hanson: Yeah, can you keep it that way? It makes you seem kind of creepy.
Amy: (after Mike gives her a dollar when she's stripping) Wow! A dollar! Now I can quit stripping, go back to vet school, and save my sick pony.
(the waitress is missing her right forearm) David Collins: (nervous) How's the chili here? Mexican Restaurant Waitress: (Surly and blasé) I'd give my right arm for a bowl.
Amy: I'm just finding it so hard to know what I want Oh, if you're like most people darlin' it's right about the time you found something worth wanting.